* * *

RATHER VAGUE.--Sir EDWARD BRADFORD, Commissioner of Police, informs the
Public, through a paragraph in the _Times_, about a meeting at the
Marylebone Vestry, that whenever in the Metropolis a street is found to be
dangerously slippery, some one (probably a policeman) is to telegraph to
the "local authority" (who? what? which? where?) and inform him, her, them
(whatever represents the aforesaid "local authority"), of the fact. Well,
and what then? Who's to do what, and when is it to be done? And what is the
penalty for not doing whatever it is?

* * * * *

SHORTLY TO APPEAR.--_Amiable Almonds_, by the Authoress of _Cross
Currents_. To be followed by _Rum Raisins, Delightful Dates, and Polly
Peach_. Also, _Dolt Care What Apples to Me!_ being the Story of "A Mal wil
a Cold id is Ed."

* * * * *

BIGOTED.--An Anti-Ritualistic old Lady objected to paying her water-rate,
when she was informed that she would be patronising "a High Service."

* * * * *

MEMORANDUM FOR MINOR POETS.--It is an elegant thing to write ballades and
_rondeaux_, but it is tyrannous to read them to your visitors.

* * * * *

THE TRAVELLING COMPANIONS.

No. XV.

SCENE--_The Table d Hote at Lugano:_ CULCHARD _has not yet caught_ Miss
PRENDERGAST'S _eye._

_Culchard_ (_to_ Mr. BELLERBY). Have you--ah--been up Monte Generoso yet?

_Mr. B._ No. (_After reflecting_) No, I haven't. But I was greatly struck
by its remarkably bold outline from below. Indeed, I dashed off a rough
sketch of it on the back of one of my visiting cards. I ought to have it
somewhere about me now. (_Searching himself._) Ah, I thought so! (_Handing
a vague little scrawl to_ CULCHARD, _who examines it with the deepest
interest._) I knock off quite a number of these while I'm abroad like this.
Send 'em in letters to relatives at home--gives them a notion of the place.
They are--ar--kind enough to value them. (CULCHARD _makes a complimentary
mumble._) Yes, I'm a very rapid sketcher. Put me with regular artists, and
give us half an hour, and I--ar--venture to say I should be on terms with
them. Make it _three_ hours, and--well, I daresay I shouldn't be in it.

_Podbury_ (_who has dropped into the chair next to_ Miss PRENDERGAST _and
her brother_). BOB, old chap, I'll come in the middle, if you don't mind. I
say, this _is_ ripping--no