I lectured, as well as the subjects I adopted, usually drew to
my class many of the advanced members of the profession, who made this a
lounge after the fatigues of the morning.

'Now, however, I approached this duty with fear and trembling; the
events of the morning had depressed my mind greatly, and I longed for
rest and retirement. The passing glance I threw at the lecture-room
through the half-opened door showed it to be crowded to the very roof,
and as I walked along the corridor I heard the name of some foreign
physician of eminence, who was among my auditory. I cannot describe
the agitation of mind I felt at this moment. My confusion, too, became
greater as I remembered that the few notes I had drawn up were left in
the pocket of the carriage, which I had just dismissed, intending to
return on foot. It was already considerably past the usual hour, and
I was utterly unable to decide how to proceed. I hastily drew out a
portfolio that contained many scattered notes and hints for lectures,
and hurriedly throwing my eye across them, discovered some singular
memoranda on the subject of insanity. On these I resolved at once to
dilate a little, and eke out, if possible, the materials for a lecture.

'The events of the remainder of that day are wrapped in much obscurity
to my mind, yet I well remember the loud thunder of applause which
greeted me on entering the lecture-room, and how, as for some moments I
appeared to hesitate, they were renewed again and again, till at
last, summoning resolution, I collected myself sufficiently to open my
discourse. I well remember, too, the difficulty the first few sentences
cost me--the doubts, the fears, the pauses, which beset me at every
step as I went on--my anxiety to be clear and accurate in conveying my
meaning making me recapitulate and repeat, till I felt myself, as it
were, working in a circle. By degrees, however, I grew warmed as I
proceeded; and the evident signs of attention my auditory exhibited gave
me renewed courage, while they impressed me with the necessity to make
a more than common exertion. By degrees, too, I felt the mist clearing
from my brain, and that even without effort my ideas came faster, and my
words fell from me with ease and rapidity. Simile and illustration came
in abundance, and distinctions which had hitherto struck me as the
most subtle and difficult of description I now drew with readiness and
accuracy. Points of an abstruse and recondite nature,