ief:
The case is, I've no case at all,
And in brief, I've ne'er had a brief!
"I've waited and waited in vain,
Expecting an 'opening' to find,
Where an honest young lawyer might gain
Some reward for toil of his mind.
"'Tis not that I'm wanting in law,
Or lack an intelligent face,
That others have cases to plead,
While I have to plead for a case.
"O, how can a modest young man
E'er hope for the smallest progression,--
The profession's already so full
Of lawyers so full of profession!"
While thus he was strolling around,
His eye accidentally fell
On a very deep hole in the ground,
And he sighed to himself, "It is well!"
To curb his emotions, he sat
On the curbstone the space of a minute,
Then cried, "Here's an opening at last!"
And in less than a jiffy was in it!
Next morning twelve citizens came
('Twas the coroner bade them attend),
To the end that it might be determined
How the man had determined his end!
"The man was a lawyer, I hear,"
Quoth the foreman who sat on the corse.
"A lawyer? Alas!" said another,
"Undoubtedly died of remorse!"
A third said, "He knew the deceased,
An attorney well versed in the laws,
And as to the cause of his death,
'Twas no doubt for the want of a cause."
The jury decided at length,
After solemnly weighing the matter,
That the lawyer was drown_d_ed, because
He could not keep his head above water!
THE TWO HUSBANDS
BY CAROLYN WELLS
Once on a Time there were Two Men, each of whom married the Woman of his
Choice. One Man devoted all his Energies to Getting Rich.
He was so absorbed in Acquiring Wealth that he Worked Night and Day to
Accomplish his End.
By this Means he lost his Health, he became a Nervous Wreck, and was so
Irritable and Irascible that his Wife Ceased to live with him and
Returned to her Parents' House.
The Other Man made no Efforts to Earn Money, and after he had Spent his
own and his Wife's Fortunes, Poverty Stared them in the Face.
Although his Wife had loved him Fondly, she could not Continue her
affection toward One who could not Support her, so she left him and
Returned to her Childhood's Home.
MORALS:
This Fable teaches that the Love of Money is the Root of All Evil, and
that When Poverty Comes In At the Door, Loves Flies Out
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