could do would be to lend
you an umbrella.'

Mention of Magee suggests an ecclesiastical tale concerning a most
convivial attorney--George Faith by name--who had rather a red nose,
which he explained was caused by wearing tight boots.

His father in old age got married a second time, and George was asked
why his stepmother was like Dr. Newman.

The answer was because she had embraced the ancient Faith.

Among old time Irish members, Joe Ronayne, M.P. for Cork, was among the
most diverting.

He was a railway contractor, and much wanted some additional ground at
the terminus of the line, which the proprietor, Lord Ventry, would not
sell.

The size of the coveted patch was only seven feet long by three broad.
Mr. Ronayne grimly retorted:--

'That's very strange, for it is exactly the amount of ground I'd like to
give him,' i.e. for his grave.

Another experience of Ronayne's was to the following tune.

He had obtained advances from a local bank for his railway contract to
the satisfaction of both parties, and when asked by the manager for some
wrinkles about the making of a railway, replied:--

'The best thing is to run it into a soft bank.'

He was a plucky chap as well as a witty one, for owing to some internal
malady, from which he died, he had to have his leg amputated, at the
same time resigning his seat for Cork.

Addressing the surgeon, he observed:--

'I cannot stand for the borough any longer, but I shall certainly stump
the constituency as a county candidate.'

Poor fellow, he was all too soon an accepted candidate for his passage
over to the great majority.

A certain attorney named Nagle used to do most of his work.

Speaking of another attorney this Nagle remarked:--

'He has the heart of a vulture.'

'I know what's worse,' was Ronayne's comment.

'Indeed!'

'Yes; the bill of an aigle' (which is the broad Cork pronunciation of
eagle).

This Nagle was not remarkable for the extent of his ablutions.

At one period, when he was becoming an ardent Radical, an obsequious
toady said:--

'You'll become a second Marat.'

'There's no fear that he will die in the same place,' promptly came from
Ronayne.

On another occasion the two were waiting for the judges outside their
lodgings during the Assizes.

Suddenly Ronayne, in the hearing of a number of acquaintances, called
out:--

'You had better come away at once, Nagle.'

'Why should I?' indignantly.

'If you stop five minutes l