crowds everywhere, I
like this animation.

My aunt wrote that the Marvel, but she doesn't call him that,
everybody at Nice in our house calls him nothing but the "shaved
magpie," so my aunt wrote that the "shaved magpie" was at the opera,
and did nothing all the evening but weep, actually weep.

There is news from Russia, nothing good, I think of nothing but
praying to God, and am in fear.

I pity myself _now_, what would it be if we should lose our fortune!
Horrible!

I pray to God and tremble. God will not abandon me.

* * * * *

Rome bores me; Nice is my beloved country. I see Rome, Paris,
London, kings, courts, but there is nothing so pretty as my dear
villa. If ever I am rich, titled, and happy, I shall not forget it.
I shall spend several months of the year there! no, several
months--I could not do that, for everywhere, except in London,
winter is the principal season.

We went to the photographer, S----'s, to tell him that I would come
to pose on Monday. I saw there a number of portraits of people I
know. While looking at L----, his wife, and L---- D----, it seemed
as if he were going to bow to me. Then a bewitching woman with big,
deep eyes, and heavy eyebrows above a straight nose. She resembles
R----. Dina says it is she. But no, she has not that round chin with
a dimple, and those magnificent eyes. No, it can't be, she is not so
beautiful.

Then to the Pincio, then to a milliner to order a Marie Stuart cap,
and a Marie Antoinette turban. The woman showed me a gown she was
making for a ball at the Quirinal, day after to-morrow.

This plunges me into inconceivable torture. If you knew how I dread
spending the Carnival without a single amusement! We found the
ambassadress's card at our home, so she has returned the visit. It
is rather late, all the same. Her cousin came at dinner time. The
Grand Duke of L---- asked who we were (who is that pretty Russian?).
B---- says Mamma ought to go to call on the Marquise de M----. He
says it is the custom here, especially from a foreigner to a Roman
lady. Let Mamma go anywhere, provided that I can go where I like. My
torture has no bounds, I am dying of it every instant. Do you want a
proof of my despair? There are times when I hope to marry A---- and
be something at Nice with P----; that gives the measure of my
discouragement, my desperation.

I have had this humiliating thought once or twice. I tell you to
show you how low I d