they do not approve, for
Want of Courage to go their own Way, are capable Persons for this
Superintendency. Those who are both to grow old, or would do any thing
contrary to the Course and Order of things, out of Fondness to be in
Fashion, are proper Candidates. To conclude, those who are in Fashion
without apparent Merit, must be supposed to have latent Qualities, which
would appear in a Post of Direction; and therefore are to be regarded in
forming these Lists. Any who shall be pleased, according to these, or
what further Qualifications may occur to himself, to send a List, is
desired to do it within fourteen days after this Date.

N. B. _The Place of the Physician to this Society, according to the last
mentioned Qualification, is already engag'd._

T.

[Footnote 1:

'All ye Venuses, Graces, and Cupids, attend:
See prepared to your hands
Darts, torches, and bands:
Your weapons here choose, and your empire extend.']

* * * * *

No. 479. Tuesday, September 9, 1712. Steele.

'--Dare Jure maritis.'

Hor.

Many are the Epistles I every day receive from Husbands, who complain of
Vanity, Pride, but above all Ill-nature, in their Wives. I cannot tell
how it is, but I think I see in all their Letters that the Cause of
their Uneasiness is in themselves; and indeed I have hardly ever
observed the married Condition unhappy, but from want of Judgment or
Temper in the Man. The truth is, we generally make Love in a Style, and
with Sentiments very unfit for ordinary Life: They are half Theatrical,
half Romantick. By this Means we raise our Imaginations to what is not
to be expected in human Life; and because we did not beforehand think of
the Creature we were enamoured of as subject to Dishumour, Age,
Sickness, Impatience or Sullenness, but altogether considered her as the
Object of Joy, human Nature it self is often imputed to her as her
particular Imperfection or Defect.

I take it to be a Rule proper to be observed in all Occurrences of Life,
but more especially in the domestick or matrimonial Part of it, to
preserve always a Disposition to be pleased. This cannot be supported
but by considering things in their right light, and as Nature has form'd
them, and not as our own Fancies or Appetites would have them. He then
who took a young Lady to his Bed, with no other Consideration than the
Expectation of Scenes of Dalliance, an