on added to one end of the
chain, in the shape of a sliding noose, with which I could easily
strangle myself if ever love should reduce me to despair, and I passed it
round my neck. As I did not want to lose even the smallest particle of so
precious a treasure, I cut with a pair of scissors all the small bits
which were left, and devoutly gathered them together. Then I reduced them
into a fine powder, and ordered the Jewish confectioner to mix the powder
in my presence with a paste made of amber, sugar, vanilla, angelica,
alkermes and storax, and I waited until the comfits prepared with that
mixture were ready. I had some more made with the same composition, but
without any hair; I put the first in a beautiful sweetmeat box of fine
crystal, and the second in a tortoise-shell box.

From the day when, by giving me her hair, Madame F---- had betrayed the
secret feelings of her heart, I no longer lost my time in relating
stories or adventures; I only spoke to her of my cove, of my ardent
desires; I told her that she must either banish me from her presence, or
crown my happiness, but the cruel, charming woman would not accept that
alternative. She answered that happiness could not be obtained by
offending every moral law, and by swerving from our duties. If I threw
myself at her feet to obtain by anticipation her forgiveness for the
loving violence I intended to use against her, she would repulse me more
powerfully than if she had had the strength of a female Hercules, for she
would say, in a voice full of sweetness and affection,

"My friend, I do not entreat you to respect my weakness, but be generous
enough to spare me for the sake of all the love I feel for you."

"What! you love me, and you refuse to make me happy! It is impossible! it
is unnatural. You compel me to believe that you do not love me. Only
allow me to press my lips one moment upon your lips, and I ask no more."

"No, dearest, no; it would only excite the ardour of your desires, shake
my resolution, and we should then find ourselves more miserable than we
are now."

Thus did she every day plunge me in despair, and yet she complained that
my wit was no longer brilliant in society, that I had lost that
elasticity of spirits which had pleased her so much after my arrival from
Constantinople. M. D---- R-----, who often jestingly waged war against me,
used to say that I was getting thinner and thinner every day. Madame
F---- told me one day that my sickly lo