"

"Certainly, but I can't make an appointment."

"And supposing I am out."

"I'll go to the tavern."

Having nothing better to do I sent Jarbe to one of the four-guinea
wenches, telling him to advise her that she would dine with me. She came.
She did not attract me sufficiently to make me attempt more than some
slight toying. She went away well pleased with her four guineas, which
she had done nothing to earn. Another wench, also at four guineas, supped
with me the following evening. She had been very pretty, and, indeed, was
so still, but she was too melancholy and quiet for my taste, and I could
not makeup my mind to tell her to undress.

The third day, not feeling inclined to try another ticket, I went to
Covent Garden, and on meeting an attractive young person I accosted her
in French, and asked her if she would sup with me.

"How much will you give me at dessert?"

"Three guineas."

"Come along."

After the play I ordered a good supper for two, and she displayed an
appetite after mine own heart. When we had supped I asked for her name
and address, and I was astonished to find that she was one of the girls
whom Lord Pembroke had assessed at six guineas. I concluded that it was
best to do one's own business, or, at any rate, not to employ noblemen as
agents. As to the other tickets, they procured me but little pleasure.
The twelve-guinea one, which I had reserved for the last, as a choice
morsel, pleased me the least of all, and I did not care to cuckold the
noble duke who kept her.

Lord Pembroke was young, handsome, rich, and full of wit. I went to see
him one day, and found him just getting out of bed. He said he would walk
with me and told his valet to shave him.

"But," said I, "there's not a trace of beard on your face."

"There never is," said he, "I get myself shaved three times a day."

"Three times?"

"Yes, when I change my shirt I wash my hands; when I wash my hands I have
to wash my face, and the proper way to wash a man's face is with a
razor."

"When do you make these three ablutions?"

"When I get up, when I dress for dinner, and when I go to bed, for I
should not like the woman who is sleeping with me to feel my beard."

We had a short walk together, and then I left him as I had some writing
to do. As we parted, he asked me if I dined at home. I replied in the
affirmative, and foreseeing that he intended dining with me I warned my
cook to serve us well, though I did not let him