and if you love our common mistress, have
a care for her honour, and above all have the strength of mind to resist
all projects which are certain to involve you in misfortune, and which
will be equally fatal to both. You know what happened to Madame de Riva,
a nun in the convent of St.----. She had to disappear after it became
known that she was with child, and M. de Frulai, my predecessor, went
mad, and died shortly after. J. J. Rousseau told me that he died of
poison, but he is a visionary who sees the black side of everything. For
my part, I believe that he died of grief at not being able to do anything
for the unfortunate woman, who afterwards procured a dispensation from
her vows from the Pope, and having got married is now living at Padua
without any position in society.

"Let the prudent and loyal friend master the lover: go and see
M---- M---- sometimes in the parlour of the convent, but not here, or the
boatmen will betray you. The knowledge which we both have that the girls
are in a satisfactory condition is a great alleviation to my distress,
but you must confess that you have been very imprudent. You have risked a
terrible misfortune; consider the position you would have been in, for I
am sure you would not have abandoned her. She had an idea that the danger
might be overcome by means of drugs but I convinced her that she was
mistaken. In God's name, be discreet in the future, and write to me
fully, for I shall always be interested in her fate, both from duty and
sentiment."

We returned together to Venice, where we separated, and I passed the rest
of the night in great distress. In the morning I wrote to the fair
afflicted, and whilst endeavouring to console her to the best of my
ability, I tried to impress on her the necessity for prudence and the
avoidance of such escapades as might eventually ruin us.

Next day I received her reply, every word of which spelt despair. Nature
had given her a disposition which had become so intensified by indulgence
that the cloister was unbearable to her, and I foresaw the hard fights I
should have to undergo.

We saw each other the Thursday after Easter, and I told her that I should
not come to the casino before midnight. She had had four hours to pass
with her lover in tears and regrets, amongst which she had often cursed
her cruel fate and the foolish resolution which made her take the veil.
We supped together, and although the meal was a rich and delicate one we
d