t without _anything_
in it."

CCCXXXVI.--READY REPLY.

THE grass-plots in the college courts or quadrangles are not for the
unhallowed feet of the under-graduates. Some, however, are hardy enough
to venture, in despite of all remonstrance. A master of Trinity had
often observed a student of his college invariably to cross the green,
when, in obedience to the calls of his appetite, he went to hall to
dine. One day the master determined to reprove the delinquent for
invading the rights of his superiors, and for that purpose he threw up
the sash at which he was sitting, and called to the student,--"Sir, I
never look out of my window but I see you walking across the
grass-plot". "My lord," replied the offender instantly, "I never walk
across the grass-plot, but I _see you_ looking out of your window." The
master, pleased at the readiness of the reply, closed his window,
convulsed with laughter.

CCCXXXVII.--FULL PROOF.

LORD PETERBOROUGH was once taken by the mob for the great Duke of
Marlborough (who was then in disgrace with them); and being about to be
roughly treated, said,--"Gentlemen, I can convince you by two reasons
that I am not the Duke of Marlborough. In the first place, I have only
_five guineas_ in my pocket; and in the second, they are heartily at
your service." He got out of their hands with loud huzzas and
acclamations.

CCCXXXVIII.--EPIGRAM ON CIBBER.

IN merry Old England it once was the rule,
The king had his poet and also his fool;
But now we're so frugal, I'd have you to know it,
That Cibber can serve both for _fool_ and for _poet_.

CCCXXXIX.--A PROPHECY.

CHARLES MATHEWS, the elder, being asked what he was going to do with his
son (the young man's profession was to be that of an architect), "Why,"
answered the comedian, "he is going to _draw houses_, like his father."

CCCXL.--A FIXTURE.

DR. ROGER LONG, the celebrated astronomer, was walking, one dark
evening, with a gentleman in Cambridge, when the latter came to a short
post fixed in the pavement, but which, in the earnestness of
conversation, taking to be a boy standing in the path, he said hastily,
"Get out of the way, boy."--"That boy," said the doctor, very seriously,
"is a _post-boy_, who never turns out of the way for anybody."

CCCXLI.--FAMILY PRIDE.

A YOUNG lady visiting in the family asked John at dinner for a potato.
John made no response. The re