Innk._ Why I see no Advantage at all, except in Processions, or War.
For in Processions there are carried about various Representations of
Saints, of _Jews_, and Heathens, and we know which is which, by the
different Habits. And in War the Variety of Dress is good, that every
one may know his own Company, and follow his own Colours, so that there
may be no Confusion in the Army.

_Con._ You say very well: This is a military Garment, one of us follows
one Leader, and another another; but we all fight under one General,
Christ. But in a Garment there are three Things to be consider'd.

_Innk._ What are they?

_Con._ Necessity, Use, and Decency. Why do we eat?

_Innk._ That we mayn't be starv'd with Hunger.

_Con._ And for the very same Reason we take a Garment that we mayn't be
starv'd with Cold.

_Innk._ I confess it.

_Con._ This Garment of mine is better for that than yours. It covers the
Head, Neck, and Shoulders, from whence there is the most Danger. Use
requires various Sorts of Garments. A short Coat for a Horseman, a long
one for one that sits still, a thin one in Summer, a thick one in
Winter. There are some at _Rome_, that change their Cloaths three Times
a Day; in the Morning they take a Coat lin'd with Fur, about Noon they
take a single one, and towards Night one that is a little thicker; but
every one is not furnish'd with this Variety; therefore this Garment of
ours is contriv'd so, that this one will serve for various Uses.

_Innk._ How is that?

_Con._ If the North Wind blow, or the Sun shines hot, we put on our
Cowl; if the Heat is troublesome, we let it down behind. If we are to
sit still, we let down our Garment about our Heels, if we are to walk,
we hold or tuck it up.

_Innk._ He was no Fool, whosoever he was, that contriv'd it.

_Con._ And it is the chief Thing in living happily, for a Man to
accustom himself to be content with a few Things: For if once we begin
to indulge ourselves with Delicacies and Sensualities, there will be no
End; and there is no one Garment could be invented, that could answer so
many Purposes.

_Innk._ I allow that.

_Con._ Now let us consider the Decency of it: Pray tell me honestly, if
you should put on your Wife's Cloaths, would not every one say that you
acted indecently?

_Innk._ They would say I was mad.

_Con._ And what would you say, if she should put on your Cloaths?

_Innk._ I should not say much perhaps, but I should cudgel her
handsomly.

_