that honor, exclaimed, "No, sir, by the d-- I hate all
fools-- No, d--n me, excuse me for that. That's a little too much, old
Dick. There are two or three officers of our regiment whom I know to be
fools; but d--n me if I am ever seen in their company. If a man hath a
fool of a relation, Dick, you know he can't help that, old boy." Such
jokes as these the old man not only tools in good part, but glibly
gulped down the whole narrative of his nephew; nor did he, I am
convinced, in the least doubt of our as readily swallowing the same.
This made him so charmed with the lieutenant, that it is probable we
should have been pestered with him the whole evening, had not the north
wind, dearer to our sea-captain even than this glory of his family,
sprung suddenly up, and called aloud to him to weigh his anchor. While
this ceremony was performing, the sea-captain ordered out his boat to
row the land-captain to shore; not indeed on an uninhabited island, but
one which, in this part, looked but little better, not presenting us the
view of a single house. Indeed, our old friend, when his boat returned
on shore, perhaps being no longer able to stifle his envy of the
superiority of his nephew, told us with a smile that the young man had a
good five mile to walk before he could be accommodated with a passage to
Portsmouth.

It appeared now that the captain had been only mistaken in the date of
his prediction, by placing the event a day earlier than it happened; for
the wind which now arose was not only favorable but brisk, and was no
sooner in reach of our sails than it swept us away by the back of the
Isle of Wight, and, having in the night carried us by Christchurch and
Peveral-point, brought us the next noon, Saturday, July 25, oft the
island of Portland, so famous for the smallness and sweetness of its
mutton, of which a leg seldom weighs four pounds. We would have bought
a sheep, but our captain would not permit it; though he needed not have
been in such a hurry, for presently the wind, I will not positively
assert in resentment of his surliness, showed him a dog's trick, and
slyly slipped back again to his summer-house in the south-west.

The captain now grew outrageous, and, declaring open war with the wind,
took a resolution, rather more bold than wise, of sailing in defiance of
it, and in its teeth. He swore he would let go his anchor no more, but
would beat the sea while he had either yard or sail left. He accordingly
stood