on the
wharf.

Wondering at his unexpected kindness, I stood gazing after him till he
disappeared behind the bulwarks; and then, mechanically putting the
knife in my pocket, I remained for a while without stirring from the
spot.

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN.

NOT BIG ENOUGH.

My reflections were anything but pleasant, for never had I been so
mortified in my life. All my fine dreams of reefing topsails, and
seeing foreign lands, had been dissipated in a period of less than ten
minutes. All my plans completely frustrated.

My first feeling was that of extreme humiliation and shame. I fancied
that the passers-by must all be aware of what had transpired, and of the
precise situation in which I stood. I saw, moreover, the heads of
several of the sailors as they stood looking at me over the bulwarks,
and upon their faces I could perceive a derisive expression. Some of
them were still laughing loudly.

I could bear it no longer, and without hesitation I hurried away from
the spot.

Near at hand were large boxes, barrels, and bales of merchandise lying
upon the wharf. They were not piled together, but scattered about, with
spaces between them. Into one of those spaces I glided, and was soon
out of sight of everybody, while everybody was equally hidden from my
sight. I felt almost as if I had got clear of some danger; so pleasant
is it to escape from ridicule, even though one may feel that he has not
deserved it.

There was a little box among the others, just big enough for a seat, and
upon this I sat down, and gave way to reflection.

What had I best do? Yield up all thoughts of the sea, and return to the
farm, and my crabbed old uncle?

You will say that this would have been the wisest course for me to have
pursued, as well as the most natural. Perhaps so; but the thought of
doing so scarcely entered my mind. I did certainly entertain the
thought, but as quickly abandoned it.

"No," said I to myself, "I am not yet conquered; I shall not retreat
like a coward. I have made one step, and I shall follow it up, if I
can. What matters it if they refuse to take me in this big proud ship?
There are others in port--scores of others. Some of them may be glad to
have me. I shall try them all before I give up my design."

"Why did they refuse me?" I asked myself, continuing my soliloquy.
"Why? They gave no reason; what could it have been? Ha! my size it
was! They compared me to a marlin-spike, and a belaying-