Tibbs,' called Mr. Calton in a very bland tone, looking over the
banisters.

'Sir!' replied he of the dirty face.

'Will you have the kindness to step up-stairs for a moment?'

'Certainly, sir,' said Tibbs, delighted to be taken notice of. The
bedroom-door was carefully closed, and Tibbs, having put his hat on the
floor (as most timid men do), and been accommodated with a seat, looked
as astounded as if he were suddenly summoned before the familiars of the
Inquisition.

'A rather unpleasant occurrence, Mr. Tibbs,' said Calton, in a very
portentous manner, 'obliges me to consult you, and to beg you will not
communicate what I am about to say, to your wife.'

Tibbs acquiesced, wondering in his own mind what the deuce the other
could have done, and imagining that at least he must have broken the best
decanters.

Mr. Calton resumed; 'I am placed, Mr. Tibbs, in rather an unpleasant
situation.'

Tibbs looked at Mr. Septimus Hicks, as if he thought Mr. H.'s being in
the immediate vicinity of his fellow-boarder might constitute the
unpleasantness of his situation; but as he did not exactly know what to
say, he merely ejaculated the monosyllable 'Lor!'

'Now,' continued the knocker, 'let me beg you will exhibit no
manifestations of surprise, which may be overheard by the domestics, when
I tell you--command your feelings of astonishment--that two inmates of
this house intend to be married to-morrow morning.' And he drew back his
chair, several feet, to perceive the effect of the unlooked-for
announcement.

If Tibbs had rushed from the room, staggered down-stairs, and fainted in
the passage--if he had instantaneously jumped out of the window into the
mews behind the house, in an agony of surprise--his behaviour would have
been much less inexplicable to Mr. Calton than it was, when he put his
hands into his inexpressible-pockets, and said with a half-chuckle, 'Just
so.'

'You are not surprised, Mr. Tibbs?' inquired Mr. Calton.

'Bless you, no, sir,' returned Tibbs; 'after all, its very natural. When
two young people get together, you know--'

'Certainly, certainly,' said Calton, with an indescribable air of
self-satisfaction.

'You don't think it's at all an out-of-the-way affair then?' asked Mr.
Septimus Hicks, who had watched the countenance of Tibbs in mute
astonishment.

'No, sir,' replied Tibbs; 'I was just the same at his age.' He actually
smiled when he said this.

'How devilish well I must carry my