dness
And women groan with grief;
Though growing daily dafter,
I might, as once I did,
Have cheered myself with laughter,
But laughter is forbid.

If I should treat of CARSON,
His guns and rataplan,
It's something worse than arson
To smile at such a man;
Since chaff would make his pulse stir--
And this he cannot brook--
The more he talks of Ulster
The solemner we look.

Then, should I meet a CECIL,
(Lord ROBERT or Lord HUGH),
His manifest distress'll
Be very sad to view
Unless I'm in a proper,
A gloomy frame of mind,
And put a heavy stopper
On mirth of any kind.

Next POUTSEA brings his quota
For giving me delight,
Who wants to punish BOTHA
By living in his sight;
Or, foiled of such a strife-time,
Decides to have a blow
And spend a briny lifetime
In sailing to and fro.

And SEDDON, who gave greetings
To those deported nine,
Invited them to meetings
And asked them out to dine,
And begged of them and prayed them
To be no longer banned,
But hardly could persuade them
To leave the ship and land.

These two, the gloom beguiling,
Might make me greatly dare,
Might set my face a-smiling
And win my soul from care;
The feted and the feeders
Might well provoke some chaff;
But no--they're Labour Leaders,
And so we mustn't laugh.

And, last, there's LAW, our BONAR,
Who in a burst of tact
Is minded to dishonour
The loathed Insurance Act;
With opposites agreeing,
He faces North by South,
And keeps the Act in being
And kills it with his mouth.

He too might smooth a wrinkle,
Although he's stern and grim,
And make my eyes to twinkle
By seeing fun in him;
Cursed be that cheerful vision,
And cursed all sense of fun:
It is a foul misprision
To smile at anyone.

* * * * *

[Illustration: REVERIE.

"NO, DARLING, NOT IN THE STUDY. YOUR FATHER WENT ROUND IN BOGEY TO-DAY AND
WANTS TO HAVE A NICE LONG THINK ABOUT IT."]

* * * * *

HAVE YOU ANYTHING TO SELL?

(_With acknowledgments to "The Daily Mail."_)

Have you anything you think of burning as useless, but would naturally
prefer to sell? Why not try one of our small advertisements? Every day we
receive thousands of letters testifying to their power. Here is one, picked
up at random:--

"Please disconti