e sides of every dead wall; for
which the disaffected party have assigned a very false and malicious
cause. They would have it, that these heaps were laid there privately by
British fundaments, to make the world believe, that our Irish vulgar do
daily eat and drink; and, consequently, that the clamour of poverty
among us, must be false, proceeding only from Jacobites and Papists.
They would confirm this, by pretending to observe, that a British anus
being more narrowly perforated than one of our own country; and many of
these excrements upon a strict view appearing copple crowned, with a
point like a cone or pyramid, are easily distinguished from the
Hibernian, which lie much flatter, and with lest continuity. I
communicated this conjecture to an eminent physician, who is well versed
in such profound speculations; and at my request was pleased to make
trial with each of his fingers, by thrusting them into the anus of
several persons of both nations, and professed he could find no such
difference between them as those ill-disposed people allege. On the
contrary, he assured me, that much the greater number of narrow cavities
were of Hibernian origin. This I only mention to shew how ready the
Jacobites are to lay hold of any handle to express their malice against
the government. I had almost forgot to add, that my friend the physician
could, by smelling each finger, distinguish the Hibernian excrement from
the British, and was not above twice mistaken in an hundred experiments;
upon which he intends very soon to publish a learned dissertation.

There is a diversion in this City, which usually begins among the
butchers, but is often continued by a succession of other people,
through many streets. It is called the COSSING of a dog; and I may
justly number it among our corruptions. The ceremony is this: A strange
dog happens to pass through a flesh-market; whereupon an expert butcher
immediately cries in a loud voice, and the proper tone, "Coss, coss,"
several times: The same word is repeated by the people. The dog, who
perfectly understands the terms of art, and consequently the danger he
is in, immediately flies. The people, and even his own brother animals
pursue; the pursuit and cry attend him perhaps half a mile; he is well
worried in his flight, and sometimes hardly escapes. This, our
ill-wishers of the Jacobite kind, are pleased to call a persecution; and
affirm, that it always falls upon dogs of the Tory principle. But