Arcadia vixi_)--
I too have strolled like that in London town,
Demanding homage from the very bricks I
Pressed with my shoes of scintillating brown;
But never till I tried the fair corrective
Of seeing khaki from a civvy suit
Could I envisage in its true perspective
That common circumstance, a Second-Loot.

* * * * *

NOT DEAD YET.

"The Hungarian Soviet Government has adopted a non-posthumous
attitude."--_Globe_.

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Host (to visitor just arrived)._ "GET YOUR OVERCOAT
OFF QUICKLY, MAN; THEN HE'LL THINK YOU BELONG TO THE HOUSE!"]

* * * * *

THE PASSING OF GREEK.

A great thanksgiving meeting (postponed till "Summer-time" on account
of the shortage of artificial heat) was held at the Albert Hall last
Saturday to celebrate the dethronement of Greek at Oxford. Mr. H.G.
WELLS presided, and there was a numerous attendance.

Mr. WELLS, while he struck and maintained a jubilant note throughout
his eloquent speech, tempered enthusiasm with caution. The Grecians,
he said, like the Greeks, were wily folk and capable of shamming dead
while they were all the while scheming and plotting to restore their
imperilled supremacy. Indeed he knew it as a fact that some of the
most infatuated scholars actually voted against compulsion, simply to
confuse the issue. Still, for the moment it was a great victory, a
crushing blow to Oxford, the stronghold of mediaevalism, incompetence
and Hanoverianism, and an immense relief to the sorely-tried physique
of the nation. For he was able to assure them, speaking with the
authority of one who had taken first-class honours in Zoology, that
the study of Greek more than anything else predisposed people to
influenza by promoting cachexia, often leading to arterio-sclerosis,
bombination of the tympanum, and even astigmatism of the pineal gland.
(Sensation.)

Mr. PEMBERTON BILLING, M.P., speaking from the seat of an aeroplane,
said that he had found the little Greek he remembered from his
school-days not only no help but a positive hindrance to his advocacy
of a strong Air policy. The efforts of the Greeks as pioneers of
aviation were grossly exaggerated and, speaking as an expert, he
denounced these literary fictions as so much hot air. There were at
least forty-seven thousand reasons against Greek, but he would
be content with two. It didn't