ireman and tinsmith. Made a number of celebrated forgings. Had
a career like the ancients and fell in love with Venus.

W

WAGNER, Dick, a Dutchman who wrote a few sheets of music, went into the
opera business, but died before the good singers or Hammerstein prices
appeared.

WALKER, Johnnie, 1820. Spent most of his life at your favorite bar until
you appeared.

WALTON, Isaac, he was the fellow who started those awful fish stories.

WASHINGTON, George, child model, father, etc. Spent early days chopping
trees, holding conversations with his father, killing Indians, and
being brave. Later he drove those tea-selling Englishmen from the United
States, said farewell to his troops, and became a politician. W. decided
he was not good enough for a third term and retired. His picture has
been widely distributed. Ambition: To be the happy father of a big
Uncle Sam. Recreation: Powdering his wig. Address: Washington. Clubs:
Anti-Ananias.

WASHINGTON, Booker T., only a distant relation of the above. A big black
man who went about the country raising money to put brains into ivory.
He also told his audience how unfortunate they were in not being coons.
(See Uncle Tom.)

WATSON, Doctor. He boswelled Sherlock Holmes.

WEBSTER, Dan., an American statesman and a member of Congress before the
invention of investigating committees. He died famous.

WEBSTER, Noah, speller, writer, reference-book maker, and language
itemizer. W. was the man to whom Mark Twain paid a glowing tribute by
saying he was a great writer, but his stories were too short.

WELLINGTON, Duke of, an Englishman who taught a great French general to
say "Tout est perdu." He later taught England that many a good soldier
makes a poor politician.

WHITEHEAD, of Fiume, Austria. Mission in life was to reduce the size of
dreadnaughts.

WHITTINGTON, Richard, proprietor of a celebrated back-fence walker.

WIDOW, Merry, a dream who hung around Mr. Maxim's restaurant in Paris,
made love to nobility, toured the world, and finally died. Death was
caused by overexertion. Before the war she was engaged to a Balkan
prince. W. visited New York, London, and Paris. Everybody fell in love
with her and whistled her praises. Past: (?) Press Agent: Frank Lehar.
Ambition: Millionaires. Recreation: After 11.45 P. M. Epitaph: When Will
There Be Another Like Her?

WIGGS, Mrs., a woman who successfully advertised cabbages.

WILLIAMS. He was the man who ruined the shaving-mu