, and
that _riz-de-veau a la financiere_ is not the smile of a calf prepared
after the recipe of a she banker.

RASCAL, n. A fool considered under another aspect.

RASCALITY, n. Stupidity militant. The activity of a clouded
intellect.

RASH, adj. Insensible to the value of our advice.

"Now lay your bet with mine, nor let
These gamblers take your cash."
"Nay, this child makes no bet." "Great snakes!
How can you be so rash?"

Bootle P. Gish

RATIONAL, adj. Devoid of all delusions save those of observation,
experience and reflection.

RATTLESNAKE, n. Our prostrate brother, _Homo ventrambulans_.

RAZOR, n. An instrument used by the Caucasian to enhance his beauty,
by the Mongolian to make a guy of himself, and by the Afro-American to
affirm his worth.

REACH, n. The radius of action of the human hand. The area within
which it is possible (and customary) to gratify directly the
propensity to provide.

This is a truth, as old as the hills,
That life and experience teach:
The poor man suffers that keenest of ills,
An impediment of his reach.

G.J.

READING, n. The general body of what one reads. In our country it
consists, as a rule, of Indiana novels, short stories in "dialect" and
humor in slang.

We know by one's reading
His learning and breeding;
By what draws his laughter
We know his Hereafter.
Read nothing, laugh never--
The Sphinx was less clever!

Jupiter Muke

RADICALISM, n. The conservatism of to-morrow injected into the
affairs of to-day.

RADIUM, n. A mineral that gives off heat and stimulates the organ
that a scientist is a fool with.

RAILROAD, n. The chief of many mechanical devices enabling us to get
away from where we are to where we are no better off. For this purpose
the railroad is held in highest favor by the optimist, for it permits
him to make the transit with great expedition.

RAMSHACKLE, adj. Pertaining to a certain order of architecture,
otherwise known as the Normal American. Most of the public buildings
of the United States are of the Ramshackle order, though some of our
earlier architects preferred the Ironic. Recent additions to the
White House in Washington are Theo-Doric, the ecclesiastic order of
the Dorians. They are exceedingly fine and cost one hundred dollars a
brick.

REALISM, n. The art of depicting nature as it is seen by toads. The
charm suffusing a landscape painted by a mole, or