her light literature; but
_Punch_ fears no rivals.

***

It has been decided by Mr. PAUL TAYLOR at Marylebone that bacon is meat.
Lord DEVONPORT, now that his suspicion has been judicially confirmed, has
announced his intention of going ahead on that basis.

***

From a school-girl's examination paper:--"_Question._ What do you know of
Tantalus? _Answer_: Tantalus suffered from continual hunger and thirst in
internal regions."

* * * * *

CHILDREN'S TALES FOR GROWN-UPS.

III.

ITS OWN REWARD.

"What fun!" cried the wasp.

"Where?" asked the bee looking up with a subdued smile.

"I mean I can't help laughing," said the wasp.

"A disgusting habit," said the bee.

"Look at those people nearly out of their wits. Here goes for old
Bless-my-Soul again!" He flew off and buzzed round the old gentleman's neck
and then flew back to the bee, laughing louder than ever at his purple
rage.

"I don't know what you think of your conduct," said the bee severely, "but
I think it is insects like you who give us all a bad name."

"Be hanged to your bad name," scoffed the wasp. "A short life and a merry
one, say I."

"A busy life and a useful one, rather," said the bee. "I am proud to be the
friend of man."

"Good heavens!" shouted the wasp. "Here comes old Bless-my-Soul bent on
murder. Look out! I'm going for his neck."

Old Bless-my-Soul slashed wildly with his table-napkin and slew the bee. He
went back triumphantly with his spoil.

"A bee!" shouted everybody. "I thought it was a wasp. I didn't know bees
were like that."

"All insects are vicious," said old Bless-my-Soul.

* * * * *

Another Impending Apology.

"LONDON PAVILION. CHEERIO! at 8.30.--'Just the thing for a dull
evening.'"--_Daily News._

* * * * *

"A few of the waiting women abandoned hope of getting potatoes, and
substituted the purchase by parsnips and sweres."--_Daily Mirror._

In the circumstances who shall blame them?

* * * * *

NOTICE.

In order to meet the national need for economy in the consumption of paper,
the Proprietors of _Punch_ are compelled to reduce the number of its pages,
but propose that the amount of matter published in _Punch_ shall by
condensation and compression be maintained and even, it is hoped,
increased.

It is further necessary that means should be