ghting it at the bottom, as
the flame in that case has the misfortune generally to put out
itself--there's an end of the affair again.

For my part, could I always have the ordering of it which way I would
be burnt myself--for I cannot bear the thoughts of being burnt like a
beast--I would oblige a housewife constantly to light me at the top; for
then I should burn down decently to the socket; that is, from my head to
my heart, from my heart to my liver, from my liver to my bowels, and
so on by the meseraick veins and arteries, through all the turns and
lateral insertions of the intestines and their tunicles to the blind
gut--

--I beseech you, doctor Slop, quoth my uncle Toby, interrupting him as
he mentioned the blind gut, in a discourse with my father the night my
mother was brought to bed of me--I beseech you, quoth my uncle Toby, to
tell me which is the blind gut; for, old as I am, I vow I do not know to
this day where it lies.

The blind gut, answered doctor Slop, lies betwixt the Ilion and Colon--

In a man? said my father.

--'Tis precisely the same, cried doctor Slop, in a woman.--

That's more than I know; quoth my father.

Chapter 4.XL.

--And so to make sure of both systems, Mrs. Wadman predetermined to
light my uncle Toby neither at this end or that; but, like a prodigal's
candle, to light him, if possible, at both ends at once.

Now, through all the lumber rooms of military furniture, including both
of horse and foot, from the great arsenal of Venice to the Tower of
London (exclusive), if Mrs. Wadman had been rummaging for seven years
together, and with Bridget to help her, she could not have found any one
blind or mantelet so fit for her purpose, as that which the expediency
of my uncle Toby's affairs had fix'd up ready to her hands.

I believe I have not told you--but I don't know--possibly I have--be it
as it will, 'tis one of the number of those many things, which a man
had better do over again, than dispute about it--That whatever town
or fortress the corporal was at work upon, during the course of
their campaign, my uncle Toby always took care, on the inside of his
sentry-box, which was towards his left hand, to have a plan of the
place, fasten'd up with two or three pins at the top, but loose at
the bottom, for the conveniency of holding it up to the eye, &c...as
occasions required; so that when an attack was resolved upon, Mrs.
Wadman had nothing more to do, when she had got advance