dy-hall.

--I wish, said Trim, as they entered the door,--instead of the sash
weights, I had cut off the church spout, as I once thought to have
done.--You have cut off spouts enow, replied Yorick.

Chapter 3.XXIV.

As many pictures as have been given of my father, how like him soever
in different airs and attitudes,--not one, or all of them, can ever help
the reader to any kind of preconception of how my father would think,
speak, or act, upon any untried occasion or occurrence of life.--There
was that infinitude of oddities in him, and of chances along with it,
by which handle he would take a thing,--it baffled, Sir, all
calculations.--The truth was, his road lay so very far on one side, from
that wherein most men travelled,--that every object before him presented
a face and section of itself to his eye, altogether different from the
plan and elevation of it seen by the rest of mankind.--In other words,
'twas a different object, and in course was differently considered:

This is the true reason, that my dear Jenny and I, as well as all the
world besides us, have such eternal squabbles about nothing.--She looks
at her outside,--I, at her in.... How is it possible we should agree
about her value?

Chapter 3.XXV.

'Tis a point settled,--and I mention it for the comfort of Confucius,
(Mr Shandy is supposed to mean..., Esq; member for...,--and not the
Chinese Legislator.) who is apt to get entangled in telling a plain
story--that provided he keeps along the line of his story,--he may go
backwards and forwards as he will,--'tis still held to be no digression.

This being premised, I take the benefit of the act of going backwards
myself.

Chapter 3.XXVI.

Fifty thousand pannier loads of devils--(not of the Archbishop of
Benevento's--I mean of Rabelais's devils), with their tails chopped off
by their rumps, could not have made so diabolical a scream of it, as I
did--when the accident befel me: it summoned up my mother instantly into
the nursery,--so that Susannah had but just time to make her escape down
the back stairs, as my mother came up the fore.

Now, though I was old enough to have told the story myself,--and young
enough, I hope, to have done it without malignity; yet Susannah, in
passing by the kitchen, for fear of accidents, had left it in short-hand
with the cook--the cook had told it with a commentary to Jonathan, and
Jonathan to Obadiah; so that by the time my father had rung the bell
hal