her to himself, a second time: in muttering which, he
plucked his pillow a little further from my mother's,--and turning about
again, there was an end of the debate for three minutes and a half.

--When he gets these breeches made, cried my father in a higher tone,
he'll look like a beast in 'em.

He will be very awkward in them at first, replied my mother.

--And 'twill be lucky, if that's the worst on't, added my father.

It will be very lucky, answered my mother.

I suppose, replied my father,--making some pause first,--he'll be
exactly like other people's children.--

Exactly, said my mother.--

--Though I shall be sorry for that, added my father: and so the debate
stopp'd again.--

--They should be of leather, said my father, turning him about again.--

They will last him, said my mother, the longest.

But he can have no linings to 'em, replied my father.--

He cannot, said my mother.

'Twere better to have them of fustian, quoth my father.

Nothing can be better, quoth my mother.--

--Except dimity,--replied my father:--'Tis best of all,--replied my
mother.

--One must not give him his death, however,--interrupted my father.

By no means, said my mother:--and so the dialogue stood still again.

I am resolved, however, quoth my father, breaking silence the fourth
time, he shall have no pockets in them.--

--There is no occasion for any, said my mother.--

I mean in his coat and waistcoat,--cried my father.

--I mean so too,--replied my mother.

--Though if he gets a gig or top--Poor souls! it is a crown and a
sceptre to them,--they should have where to secure it.--

Order it as you please, Mr. Shandy, replied my mother.--

--But don't you think it right? added my father, pressing the point home
to her.

Perfectly, said my mother, if it pleases you, Mr. Shandy.--

--There's for you! cried my father, losing his temper--Pleases me!--You
never will distinguish, Mrs. Shandy, nor shall I ever teach you to do
it, betwixt a point of pleasure and a point of convenience.--This was on
the Sunday night:--and further this chapter sayeth not.

Chapter 3.LXII.

After my father had debated the affair of the breeches with my
mother,--he consulted Albertus Rubenius upon it; and Albertus Rubenius
used my father ten times worse in the consultation (if possible) than
even my father had used my mother: For as Rubenius had wrote a quarto
express, De re Vestiaria Veterum,--it was Rubenius's business to