over that disease when he no
more sees Gammer Gurton, who acts on his eyes like a stinking onion, and
makes them always red and running water. Good-by, old onion! I am going
to Tib."

But Gammer Gurton whirled up out of her elbow-chair like a top, and was
upon Hodge, whom she held by the coat-tail, and brought him to a stand.

"You dare go to Tib again! You dare pass that door and you shall see
that the gentle, peaceable, and patient Gammer Gurton is changed into
a lioness, when any one tries to tear from her that most sacred and
dearest of treasures, her husband. For you are my husband, inasmuch as I
have your word that you will marry me."

"But I have not told you when and where I will do it, Gammer Gurton;
and so you can wait to all eternity, for only in heaven will I be your
husband."

"That is an abominable, malicious lie!" screamed Gammer Gurton. "A
good-for-nothing lie, say I! For did you not long ago snivel and beg
till I was forced to promise you to make a will, and in it declare
Hodge, my beloved husband, sole heir of all my goods and chattels, and
bequeath to him everything I have scraped together in my virtuous and
industrious life?"

"But you did not make it--the will. You broke your word; and, therefore,
I will do the same."

"Yes, I have made it, you greyhound. I have made it; and this very day
I was going with you to a justice of the peace and have it signed, and
then to-morrow we would have got married."

"You have made the will, you round world of love?" said Hodge tenderly,
as with his long, withered, spindling arms he tried to clasp the
gigantic waist of his beloved. "You have made the will and declared me
your heir? Come, then, Gammer Gurton, come, let us go to the justice of
the peace!"

"But do you not see, then," said Gammer Gurton, with a tender, cat-like
purr, "do you not see, then, that you rumple my frill when you hug me
so? Let me go, then, and help me find my needle quickly, for without the
needle we cannot go to the justice of the peace."

"What, without the needle not go to the justice of the peace?"

"No; for only see this hole which Gib, the cat, tore in my prettiest cap
awhile ago, as I took the cap out of the box and laid it on the table.
Indeed I cannot go to the justice of the peace with such a hole in my
cap! Search then, Hodge, search, so that I can mend my cap, and go with
you to the justice of the peace!"

"Lord God, where in the world can it be, the unlucky needl