is first scruples of
conscience were overcome, he would need no more persuading, he would
often grow desperate, and be as great a blackguard as any of them could
desire--but only to lament his own unutterable wickedness and degradation
the more when the fit was over.

'At last, one day when he and I were alone together, after pondering
awhile in one of his gloomy, abstracted moods, with his arms folded and
his head sunk on his breast, he suddenly woke up, and vehemently grasping
my arm, said,--

'"Huntingdon, this won't do! I'm resolved to have done with it."

'"What, are you going to shoot yourself?" said I.

'"No; I'm going to reform."

'"Oh, that's nothing new! You've been going to reform these twelve
months and more."

'"Yes, but you wouldn't let me; and I was such a fool I couldn't live
without you. But now I see what it is that keeps me back, and what's
wanted to save me; and I'd compass sea and land to get it--only I'm
afraid there's no chance." And he sighed as if his heart would break.

'"What is it, Lowborough?" said I, thinking he was fairly cracked at
last.

'"A wife," he answered; "for I can't live alone, because my own mind
distracts me, and I can't live with you, because you take the devil's
part against me."

'"Who--I?"

'"Yes--all of you do--and you more than any of them, you know. But if I
could get a wife, with fortune enough to pay off my debts and set me
straight in the world--"

'"To be sure," said I.

'"And sweetness and goodness enough," he continued, "to make home
tolerable, and to reconcile me to myself, I think I should do yet. I
shall never be in love again, that's certain; but perhaps that would be
no great matter, it would enable me to choose with my eyes open--and I
should make a good husband in spite of it; but could any one be in love
with me?--that's the question. With your good looks and powers of
fascination" (he was pleased to say), "I might hope; but as it is,
Huntingdon, do you think anybody would take me--ruined and wretched as I
am?"

'"Yes, certainly."

'"Who?"

'"Why, any neglected old maid, fast sinking in despair, would be
delighted to--"

'"No, no," said he--"it must be somebody that I can love."

'"Why, you just said you never could be in love again!"

'"Well, love is not the word--but somebody that I can like. I'll search
all England through, at all events!" he cried, with a sudden burst of
hope, or desperation. "Succeed or fail, it will