I do have it--hear that!"

"Sh! or I'll shake ye! Don't make a fool o' yourself, Maud. Wait till
I get to-night's receipts----"

"I won't! I'd like to see you shake me; ha! ha!"

Here the angry figures became plastic and tilted at each other
menacingly; the woman seized something and threw it; there was a crash.

Aunt Salomy choked placidly over her cracker crumbs. Mrs. Kobbe gazed
with faithful interest.

Soon the very tall and hard-looking young man who had sold me the
tickets came down from behind the curtain, with a hang-dog air, and his
handkerchief bound about his head, and returned to the office at the
door.

Almost at the same moment Captain Pharo and Uncle Coffin walked
fearlessly up the aisle, their familiar hats on their heads, their
pipes in harmonious glowing action, and sat down beside us with beams
of recognition.

The hard young man, who appeared to be pecuniary manager as well as
leading star of the show, came to us. "No smoking here!" he said,
severely.

"No smokin'!" replied Captain Pharo. "Ye'd orter put it on yer
plackards then! D'ye s'pose I'd come to yer show ef I'd known that?
Come along, Coffin! I'm goin' ter hang out outside, by clam!

[Illustration: Music fragment: "'My days are as the grass, Or as--'"]

"No singing, either, sir, on the part of the audience. This company is
from Boston, sir."

"Is she?" said Captain Pharo, with blighting sarcasm, new-lighting his
pipe preparatory to leaving the hall; "I thought she was from Jaffy!"

"Dodrabbit ye, Pharo!" said Uncle Coffin, wirily folding his powerful
arms; "keep yer seat, Pharo, and keep yer pipe. Ef any man from
Boston, or any other man, wants ter take the pipe outer my mouth, or
outer Pharo Kobbe's mouth, let 'im come on an' try it!"

At this opportunity, I silently pressed a coin of such meaning into the
manager's hand that he skipped gracefully past us to the stage, where
he proceeded to explain--while the ribs of court-plaster with which he
had endeavored to conceal his wounds kept constantly falling upon the
floor--that, owing to the unavoidable illness of some of the actors, he
should be obliged to give us a choice variety entertainment instead of
the play advertised.

Captain Pharo and Uncle Coffin, not yet comprehending this idea, and
smoking triumphantly with their hats on, listened to several ranting
recitations from the wife who had so inopportunely defaced her
husband's visage; but when, after a brief