tinued Lunette,
sneezing over a culinary preparation of pepper, "though 't we ought to
have two mails a week! Ef I was so dyin' crazy for news 's that, I'd
go an' live to Machias!"

"That does seem dissipated and unreasonable, certainly," I assented,
interested in the endeavor to extract the minutest pin-feathers from
the tail of the sand-peep.

"Ef they was all like Major Henry, I told 'em, the post-office 'ud be
easy runnin', an' I don't care if I do say it afore his face. I'd say
it afore the meet'n-house--ef there was one. The very first time 't
Major Henry ever stepped inter this post-office he come up to me an'
handed me a five-dollar bill, 'n' says he:

"'Mardam, could you kin'ly put my mail t' one side, me not all'as bein'
convienent to be here at its openin', maybe; an' all the mail that
ain't called for at its openin' bein' thrun up onter the top pantry
shelf,' says he, ''nd everybody 't comes in lookin' it over t' see ef
they've got anything, is a most beautiful compliment to human natur','
says he, 'an' one that I wish I could interduce everywhere; but me not
bein' vary tall,' he says, 'an' kind o' near-sighted, I'm afeered as I
might git somethin' 't didn't belong to me. Have ye got anythin' like
a dror, or anythin' 't ye could lock up?' says he.

"'No,' says I, 'I hain't, but I'll tell ye what I can do. I can put
'em inter th' old Gran'mother Tyson soup-turreen, 't I don't believe
the led of it 's been lifted this ten year; they'll be as safe as ef
they was buried an' in their graves,' says I. An' so I thought, but ye
know how things is all'as sartin to happen.

"What, in the name o' ructions, did Ty do but come home that afternoon
with a bag o' ches'nits, which he knows I won't have in the pantry on
account o' breedin' worms; but me bein' over to Mis' Kobbe's, what does
he do, manlike, but dump them letters inter the churn, an' go an' sneak
his ches'nits inter th' old Granm'er Tyson soup-turreen.

"Wal, I all'as churn my butter Friday mornin', come hail, come wind: so
I gits up--an' 'twas kind o' dark yit--an' in I pours the pail o' cream
an' begins to churn, an' thinks I, 'This spatters onaccountable this
mornin',' an' took off the cover to see what the ructions was!

"Wal, the verdick of it was, after I'd laid into Ty, I went down to
major with the five-dollar bill an' another atop of it, all I had in
this livin' world--'An' ef that 's any objec', major,' says I, a-wipin'
of my eyes, 'it's