and Mother had to go
after you,' said Sister Angela. 'We all thought you were going to
run away.' And they went into the details as to how they had felt on
their arrival, and various little incidents were recalled,
illustrating the experience of previous postulants, and these were
productive of much hilarity.

"'What did you all think of the cake?' said Sister Barbara suddenly.

"'Was it Angela's cake?' asked Mother Hilda. 'Angela, I really must
congratulate you; you will be quite a distinguished _chef_ in time.'

"Sister Angela blushed with delight, saying, 'Yes, I made it
yesterday, Mother; but, of course, Sister Rufina stood over me to
see that I didn't forget anything.'

"'Ah, well, I don't think I cared very much for the flavouring,' said
Sister Barbara in pondering tones.

"'You seemed to me to be enjoying it very much at the time,' I said,
joining the conversation for the first time; and when I added that
Sister Barbara had eaten four slices of bread and butter the laugh
turned against Barbara, and every one was hilarious. It is evident
that Sister Barbara's appetite is considered an excellent joke in
the novitiate.

"Of course I marvelled that grown-up women should be so easily
amused, and then remembered a party at the Savoy Hotel (on leaving
it I went to the presbytery to confess to you, Monsignor). I had to
admit to myself that the talk at Louise Helbrun's party did not move
on a higher level; our conversation did not show us to be wiser than
the novices, and our behaviour was certainly less exemplary.
Everything is attitude of mind, and the convent attitude towards life
is curiously sympathetic to me... at present. My doubts lest it
should not always be so is caused by the fury of my dislike to my
former attitude of mind; something tells me that such fury as mine
cannot be maintained, and will be followed by a certain reaction. I
don't mean that I shall ever again return to a life of sin, that
life is done with for ever. Even if I should fall again--the thought
is most painful to me--but even if that should happen it would be a
passing accident, I never could again continue in sin, for the memory
of the suffering sin has caused me would be sure to bring me back
again and force me to take shelter and to repent.

"I know too much belief in one's own power of resistance is not a
good thing, but I can hardly bear to think of the suffering I
endured during those weeks with Ulick Dean, walking in Hyde Par