k."

The guests having been introduced, explanations followed.

"You know my theory," began old Mr, Brown.

"Yes, rather; I should think we do," interrupted Millie, leading him
to the most comfortable armchair "But," she quoted, "you are old, Mr.
Brown; do you think at your age it is right?"

"Well, the theory's smashed, anyhow," said John decisively, "and so's my
fence."

"No! no! I won't hear of it," laughed Brown; "I admit the fence, but not
the theory. You see," he went on, turning to Mrs. Robinson, "I've always
insisted, as Smith knows, that there's plenty of landing space in his
paddock, provided you do it up wind. The fact is I glided in to-night
from east to west. Thought I should be dead head on; but I believe I was
a couple of points out in my reckoning and so failed to bring the old
'bus to a stand short of the fence. You know, Smith," he added, with an
injured air, "you ought to have a wind-pointer rigged up so's there'd be
no doubt about it."

"Just to encourage reckless old gentlemen to smash up my premises, I
suppose," retorted John. "But I admit I found some consolation for my
smashed fence when I observed the pathetic appearance of your under
carriage, after your famous landing."

"And now," said Millie to Mr. Brown, "all will be forgotten and forgiven
if you'll come into the drawing-room and let Mr. and Mrs. Robinson hear
you sing that jolly song about

"'Come and have a flip
In a big H Pip,' etc.

"You know."

* * * * *

"The egg shortage notwithstand, the Easter egg rolling carnival at
Preston, which dates back to mediaeval times, was, after a lapse of
four years, celebrated with great musto."

_Midland Paper._

Pre-war eggs, apparently.

* * * * *

ANOTHER CANDID CANDIDATE.

"---- BOARD OF GUARDIANS.

"Mrs. ---- desires to thank all who voted so splendidly, placing her at
the top of the pole."

_Provincial Paper_.

* * * * *

"The queue at one part of the morning extended from the booking
office, past the Midland Station entrance, into City Square,
along the front of the Queen's Hotel, to the top of
yesterday."--_Yorkshire Paper_.

Better than the middle of next week, anyhow.

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Voice_. "IS THAT THE GREAT SOUTHERN RAILWAY?"

_Flapper_. "YES."

_Voice_. "ARE YOU THE PASSENGER DEPARTM