an
et caetera that rolled a series of tremendous reverberations down the
list of all things held precious by freeborn Englishmen.

She would have prevented the reading. But the colonel would have it.

'Read on,' said he. 'Mr. Romfrey saw no harm.'

Captain Baskelett held up Dr. Shrapnel's letter to Commander Beauchamp,
at about half a yard's distance on the level of his chin, as a
big-chested singer in a concert-room holds his music-scroll.

CHAPTER XXIX

THE EPISTLE OF DR. SHRAPNEL TO COMMANDER BEAUCHAMP

Before we give ear to the recital of Dr. Shrapnel's letter to his pupil
in politics by the mouth of Captain Baskelett, it is necessary to defend
this gentleman, as he would handsomely have defended himself, from the
charge that he entertained ultimate designs in regard to the really
abominable scrawl, which was like a child's drawing of ocean with here
and there a sail capsized, and excited his disgust almost as much as did
the contents his great indignation. He was prepared to read it, and stood
blown out for the task, but it was temporarily too much for him. 'My dear
Colonel, look at it, I entreat you,' he said, handing the letter for
exhibition, after fixing his eye-glass, and dropping it in repulsion. The
common sentiment of mankind is offended by heterodoxy in mean attire; for
there we see the self-convicted villain--the criminal caught in the act;
we try it and convict it by instinct without the ceremony of a jury; and
so thoroughly aware of our promptitude in this respect has our arch-enemy
become since his mediaeval disgraces that his particular advice to his
followers is now to scrupulously copy the world in externals; never to
appear poorly clothed, nor to impart deceptive communications in bad
handwriting. We can tell black from white, and our sagacity has taught
him a lesson.

Colonel Halkett glanced at the detestable penmanship. Lord Palmet did the
same, and cried, 'Why, it's worse than mine!'

Cecilia had protested against the reading of the letter, and she declined
to look at the writing. She was entreated, adjured to look, in Captain
Baskelett's peculiarly pursuing fashion; a 'nay, but you shall,' that she
had been subjected to previously, and would have consented to run like a
schoolgirl to escape from.

To resume the defence of him: he was a man incapable of forming plots,
because his head would not hold them. He was an impulsive man, who could
impale a character of either sex by narr