e media for spreading the blessed news that
England was at her last gasp, throttled by place-hunters and parasites.
That was the variety stage. It was wonderful what a good comic song
could do. He had heard one only the night before, in which its singer
had been vociferously applauded at the end of a verse which stated that
there were now no German spies in England because they had all been
naturalised and given War Office clerkships. That was the kind of home
truth which the public appreciated and even paid their money to hear.
There could not be too many songs of that kind.

Mr. BERNARD SHAW said that another way was to induce publishers to issue
new and amended editions of those popular writers who had been betrayed
by impulsiveness or short-sight into eulogies of England. He remembered
several such unfortunate outbursts in the works of the national poet.
There was, for example, that ill-balanced utterance of the dying JOHN OF
GAUNT in praise of our little isle; but of course one could not expect
the intellect to be at its best just before dissolution. Still, they
would all agree that SHAKSPEARE would be the wholesomer without that
passage. (Cheers.)

The Chairman then put the resolution to the meeting and it was carried
unanimously. In bidding the gathering farewell the Chairman impressed
upon them that their rule of life should be a constant and voluble
mistrust of our leaders. It should be a point of honour with them to
deny that the FIRST LORD OF THE ADMIRALTY could possibly know anything
about the Navy, or wish it to succeed; that the CHANCELLOR OF THE
EXCHEQUER could possibly know anything about finance; or the PRIME
MINISTER have the elements even of common intelligence. (Loud cheers.)

The meeting then broke up singing either "For they (the Cabinet) are
wholly bad fellows," or "Fool Britannia, Britannia's fooled and slaved."

* * * * *

Fashions for Fathers.

"The bride was given away by her father, who was daintily gowned
in a pale blue silk dress, with veil and orange blossoms lent by
the bride's eldest sister."--_Provincial Paper._

* * * * *

"Very often it happens that a blank space is seen in the press,
especially in the _Sheung Po_, the organ of the Seventy-two
Guilds. It is surprising to see to-day's issue of that paper. A
space, about one and a half feet long and six feet wide, is
vacant. Only five