d control, and the
walls collapsed, and several firemen were hurt. [The ideas here
are too important to be run together in one sentence.]

Right: By this time the flames were beyond control, and the
walls collapsed. Several firemen were hurt.

A quotation gains emphasis when it is separated from what follows.

Faulty: "The best laid schemes o' mice an' men
Gang aft a-gley,"

are some lines from Burns which McDonald was always quoting.

Right: "The best laid schemes o' mice an' men
Gang aft a-gley."

McDonald was always quoting these lines from Burns.

Direct discourse is more emphatic when it is separated from explanatory
phrases, particularly from those which follow.

Faulty: Mosher leaped to the stage and shouted defiantly, "I
will never consent to that!" and he looked as if he meant what
he said.

Right: Mosher leaped to the stage and shouted his defiance: "I
will never agree to that!" And he looked as if he meant what he
said.

Exercise:

1. After the tents are pitched, the beds made, and the fires
started, the first meal is cooked and served, and this meal is
the beginning of camp-life joy.

2. He tried to make his wife vote for his own, the Citizen's
Party, but she firmly refused.

3. At the word of command the dog rushed forward; the covey
rose with a mighty whir, and the hunter fired both barrels, and
the dog looked in vain for a dead bird, and then returned
disconsolate.

4. I sat and gazed at the motto, "Aim high, and believe
yourself capable of great things," which my mother had placed
there for me.

5. "A Book of Verses underneath the Bough,
A Jug of Wine, a Loaf of Bread, and Thou
Beside me singing in the Wilderness."

were the four things Omar Khayyam wanted to make him happy.

=Emphasis by Subordination=

=42. Do not place the important idea of a sentence in a subordinate
clause or phrase. Make the important idea grammatically independent. If
possible, subordinate the rest of the sentence to it.=

Faulty: He had a manner which made me angry.

Faulty: The fire spread to the third story, when the house was
doomed.

Faulty: For years the Indians molested the white people,
thereby causing the settlers to want revenge.

The important idea should not be placed in