ch, large chunks of
self-respect among other things, it should all come to nothing in the
end. Ellaline will want to kill me, for I have thrown her to the lions.
It won't be my fault if they don't eat her up.

Oh, darling, I do feel horribly about it, and really and truly, without
exaggeration, I would have died sooner than repay her kindness to me by
giving her away like this. An ancestress of yours in the Revolution ran
up the steps of the guillotine laughing and kissing her hands to the
friends she left in the tumbril, and I could have been almost half as
brave if by so doing I might have avoided this dreadful abandoning of
Ellaline's interests, trusted to me. But what can you do between two
evils? Isn't it a law of nature, or something, to choose the lesser?

Dick went just the one step too far, and pulled the chain too tight. He
had begun to think he could make me do anything.

A little while ago, I was alone in the armoury, absorbed in looking at a
wonderful engraving of the tragic last Earl of Derwentwater, when
suddenly Dick came up behind me. I wanted to go, and made excuses to
escape, but he wouldn't let me; and rather than have a scene--in case
anyone might come--I let him walk me about, and point out strange old
weapons on the wall. That was only a blind, however. He had something
particular to say, and said it. There was another thing I must do for
him: find a way of informing Sir Lionel, prettily and nicely, that Mrs.
Senter cared for him, and was very unhappy.

I flew out in an instant, and said that I'd do no such thing.

"You must," said he.

"I won't," said I. "Nobody can make me."

"Oh, can't they?" said he. "I can, then, and I mean to. If you refuse to
do it, I shall believe you're in love with Sir Lionel yourself."

"I don't care what you believe," I flung at him. "There's no shame in
saying I like Sir Lionel too well and respect him too much to have any
hand in making him miserable all the rest of his life."

"Do you insinuate that marrying my aunt would make him miserable?" Dick
wanted to know.

"I don't insinuate. I assert," said I. And by that time I was in such a
temper, and my nerves had so gone to bits that I didn't know, and cared
less, what I was saying. I went on and told Dick exactly what I thought
of Mrs. Senter, and that for a loyal, true sort of man like Sir Lionel
it would be better to die at once than have her for his wife--for that
would be death, too, only slow and linge