onary in one cheek, a Latin Neksuggawn in the other, an Doctor
Gallagher's Irish Sarmons nately on the top of his tongue between the
two."

"Fadher, but that unfortunately I am afflicted wid modesty, I'd blush
crocus for your ignorance, as Virgil asserts in his Bucolics, _ut
Virgilius ait in Bucolids_; and as Horatius, a book that I'm well
acquainted wid, says in another place, _Huc pertinent verba_, says
he, _commodandi, comparandi, dandi, prornittendi, soluendi imperandi
nuntiandi, fidendi, obsequendi, minandi irascendi, et iis contraria_."

"That's a good boy, Dinny; but why would you blush for my ignorance,
avourneen? Take care of yourself now an' spake deep, for I'll outargue
you at the heel o' the hunt, cute as you are."

"Why do I blush for your ignorance, is it? Why thin, I'm sure I have
sound rasons for it; only think of the gross persivarance wid which
you call that larned work, the Lexicon in Greek, a neck-suggan. Fadher,
never, attimpt to argue or display your ignorance wid me again. But,
moreover, I can probate you to be an ungrammatical man from your own
modus of argument."

"Go an, avourneen. Phadrick!!"

"I'm listenin'. The sorra's no match for his cuteness, an' one's puzzled
to think where he can get it all."

"Why, you don't know at all what I could do by larnin'. It would be no
throuble to me to divide myself into two halves, an' argue the one agin
the other."

"You would, in throth, Dinny."

"Ay, father, or cut myself acrass, an' dispute my head, maybe, agin my
heels."

"Throth, would you!"

"Or practise logic wid my right hand, and bate that agin wid my left."

"The sarra lie in it."

"Or read the Greek Tistament wid my right eye, an thranslate it at the
same time wid my left, according to the Greek an' English sides of my
face, wid my tongue constrein' into Irish, unknownst to both o' them."

"Why, Denis, he must have a head like a bell to be able to get into
things."

"Throth an' he has that, an' 'ill make a noise in conthroversy yet, if
he lives. Now, Dinny, let us have a hate at histhory."

"A hate at histhory?--wid all my heart; but before we begin, I tell you
that I'll confound you precipitately; for you see, if you bate me in the
English, I'll scarify you wid Latin, and give you a bang or two of Greek
into the bargain. Och! I wish you'd hear the sackin' I gave Tom Reilly
the other day; rubbed him down, as the masther says, wid a Greek towel,
an' whenever I complimented him