came of a family far inferior to our own, the
Razorbills. Indeed, her people--of the Nonconformist stock--really had
nothing but wealth and rectitude, and I think my brother Bob, in his
genuine love for her, was willing to overlook the latter for the sake
of the former.

My pretty sister-in-law's interest in my affairs always made me believe
that she secretly worshiped me--although it was a fact, as will be seen
in the progress of this story, that most women blushed on my addressing
them. I used to say it "was the reflection of my red hair on a
transparent complexion," which was rather neat--wasn't it? And subtle?
But then, I was always saying such subtle things.

"My dear Rose," I said, laying down my egg spoon (the egg spoon really
had nothing to do with this speech, but it imparted such a delightfully
realistic flavor to the scene), "I'm not to blame if I resemble the
S'helpburgs."

"It's your being so beastly proud of it that I object to!" she replied.
"And for Heaven's sake, try to BE something, and not merely resemble
things! The fact is you resemble too much--you're ALWAYS resembling.
You resemble a man of fashion, and you're not; a wit, and you're not; a
soldier, a sportsman, a hero--and you're none of 'em. Altogether,
you're not in the least convincing. Now, listen! There's a good
chance for you to go as our attache with Lord Mumblepeg, the new
Ambassador to Cochin China. In all the novels, you know, attaches are
always the confidants of Grand Duchesses, and know more state secrets
than their chiefs; in real life, I believe they are something like a
city clerk with a leaning to private theatricals. Say you'll go! Do!"

"I'll take a few months' holiday first," I replied, "and then," I added
in my gay, dashing way, "if the place is open--hang it if I don't go!"

"Good old bounder!" she said, "and don't think too much of that
precious Prince Rupert. He was a bad lot."

She blushed again at me--as her husband entered.

"Take Rose's advice, Rupert, my boy," he said, "and go!"

And that is how I came to go to Trulyruralania. For I secretly
resolved to take my holiday in traveling in that country and trying, as
dear Lady Burleydon put it, really to be somebody, instead of
resembling anybody in particular. A precious lot SHE knew about it!

CHAPTER II

IN WHICH MY HAIR CAUSES A LOT OF THINGS

You go to Trulyruralania from Charing Cross. In passing through Paris
we picked up Mlle. Beljamb