came too ridiculous for further
gravity. We both laughed outright. I entered, and found the captain with
a child three days old tucked under his right arm, or that which had
been concealed by the door. The explanation was very simple, and
infinitely to his credit.

Marie, the _locum tenens_ of the lady who had let the apartment, and the
wife of a coachman who was in the country, was the mother of the infant.
After its birth she presented herself to her new master; told her story;
adding, by means of an interpreter, that if he turned her away, she had
no place in which to lay her head. The kind-hearted fellow made out to
live abroad as well as he could for a day or two--an easy thing enough
in Paris, by the way,--and when I so unexpectedly entered, Marie was
actually cooking the captain's breakfast in the kitchen while he was
nursing the child in the _salon!_

The dialogues between the captain and Marie were to the last degree
amusing. He was quite unconscious of the odd sounds he uttered in
speaking French, but thought he was getting on very well, being rather
minute and particular in his orders; and she felt his kindness to
herself and child so sensibly, that she always fancied she understood
his wishes. I was frequently compelled to interpret between them; first
asking him to explain himself in English, for I could make but little of
his French myself. On one occasion he invited me to breakfast, as we
were to pass the day exploring in company. By way of inducement, he told
me that he had accidentally found some cocoa in the shell, and that he
had been teaching Marie how to cook it "ship-fashion." I would not
promise, as his hour was rather early, and the distance between us so
great; but before eleven I would certainly be with him. I breakfasted at
home therefore, but was punctual to the latter engagement. "I hope you
have breakfasted?" cried the captain, rather fiercely, as I entered. I
satisfied him on this point; and then, after a minute of demure
reflection, he resumed, "You are lucky; for Marie boiled the cocoa, and,
after throwing away the liquor, she buttered and peppered the shells,
and served them for me to eat! I don't see how she made such a mistake,
for I was very particular in my directions, and be d----d to her! I
don't care so much about my own breakfast neither, for that can be had
at the next _cafe_; but the poor creature has lost hers, which I told
her to cook out of the rest of the cocoa." I had th