cremated, all for lack
Of coal to feed our funeral pyres,
Still "in our ashes [yonder] live their wonted fires."

O.S.

* * * * *

THE MINISTRY OF ANCESTRY.

"As you are aware," said a prominent official of the Ministry of
Ancestry, "although our department has only been in existence for a
few months the profits have enabled the Government to take twopence
off the income-tax and to provide employment for thousands of
deserving clerks dismissed, in deference to public opinion, from other
Government offices."

"Yes. Could you tell me how this brilliant scheme came into being?"

"The Chinese knew and practised it for centuries. Here the credit for
its re-discovery must be assigned to Sir Cuthbert Shover, who, owing
to handsome contributions to necessary funds, combined, of course,
with meritorious public service during the War, was offered a
baronetcy. He refused it for himself, but accepted it for his aged
father, thereby becoming second baronet in three months. He deplored
the fact that his grandfather was no longer eligible for the honour.
Then we saw light. Why should the mere accident of death prevent us
from honouring a man if his family were prepared to contribute towards
the country's exchequer? But these letters will give you a clearer
insight into the working of the department."

The first letter was addressed to Miss Cannon, at Maidstone:--

"DEAR MADAM,--We have no hesitation in advising you to have a
bishop in your family. Few purchases give greater satisfaction.
If, as you say, your late maternal grandfather was curate of
Slowden, and was, as far as you are aware, a man of exemplary
character, we could make him a bishop without delay. Your home
being in Kent, it occurs to us that the see of Carlisle would suit
the Right Reverend Prelate best. The cost of the proceedings,
including a pre-dated _Conge d'Elire_, would be eight hundred
guineas. An archbishopric would be slightly more expensive and, in
our opinion, less suitable."

"Amazing," I said.

"But so simple. Here is a letter from a man who wants to have had
forbears in the Navy. We say:--

"'Naturally it would have been an advantage for your son, whom you
destine for the Navy, to have had relations in that service. But
it is not too late to remedy this defect.

"'By virtue of the powers conferred upon us by Act of Parliament
(Ancestry