other northern and western centres."

Evidently a case where evil communications corrupt good spelling.

* * * * *

From a feuilleton:--

"Before the podgy dealer knew what had happened, she had sprung right
round him, seized the telephone instrument and placed her mouth to the
receiver. She smiled at him defiantly. 'Yes, I will,' she panted."--
_Daily Paper._

And then, we suppose, she wrote to the POSTMASTER-GENERAL to complain of
the inefficiency of the service.

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Junior Partner of Firm_ (_exempted on business grounds
during the War, interviewing applicant for employment, a demobilised
officer, D.S.O., M.C., mentioned twice in despatches and wounded three
times_). "YOU SAY YOU WERE THREE-AND-A-HALF YEARS IN FRANCE AND YET DON'T
SPEAK THE LANGUAGE? IT SEEMS TO ME YOU WASTED YOUR TIME ABROAD, SIR."]

* * * * *

CHANGES IN CLUB-LAND.

(_By a Student of Manners._)

The Roman satirist sang of poets reciting their verses in the month of
August. If he were alive now he would find as fruitful a subject in the
renovations and decorations of Clubland. Clubs are strange institutions;
they go in for Autumn not Spring cleaning. Happily all Clubs are not
renovated at the same time, otherwise the destitution of members would be
pitiful to contemplate. Even as it is the temporary accommodation offered
by their neighbours is not unattended by serious drawbacks. The standard of
efficiency in bridge and billiards is not the same; the cuisine of one
Club, though admirable in itself, may not suit the digestions of members of
another; the opportunities for repose vary considerably. In short, August
and September are trying months for the clubman who is obliged to remain in
London. But by October Pall Mall is itself again, and we are glad to be
able to state that in certain Clubs the amenities and comforts available
will be greatly enhanced.

For example the Megatherium, which is now in the hands of the decorators,
is being painted a pale pink outside, a colour which recent experiments
have shown to exert a peculiarly humanising and tranquillising influence on
persons of an irritable disposition. A sumptuous dormitory is being erected
on the top floor, where slow music will be discoursed every afternoon, from
three to seven, by a Czecho-Slovak orchestra. A roof-garden is being laid
out fo