foolish subject of the
stupid book (mine), and by making it worth your while to account
logically for your wish about my not mentioning it to Mr. Kenyon? You
could not fancy for one moment that I was vexed in the matter of the
book? or in the other matter of your wish? Now just hear me. I
explained to you that I had been silent to Mr. Kenyon, first because
the fact was so; and next and a little, because I wanted to show how I
anticipated your wish by a wish of my own ... though from a different
motive. _Your_ motive I really did take to be (never suspecting my
dear kind cousin of treason) to be a natural reluctancy of being
convicted (forgive me!) of such an arch-womanly curiosity. For my own
motive ... motives ... they are more than one ... you must trust me;
and refrain as far as you can from accusing me of an over-love of
Eleusinian mysteries when I ask you to say just as little about your
visits here and of me as you find possible ... _even to Mr. Kenyon_
... as _to every other person whatever_. As you know ... and yet more
than you know ... I am in a peculiar position--and it does not follow
that you should be ashamed of my friendship or that I should not be
proud of yours, if we avoid making it a subject of conversation in
high places, or low places. There! _that_ is my request to you--or
commentary on what you put 'off your mind' yesterday--probably quite
unnecessary as either request or commentary; yet said on the chance of
its not being so, because you seemed to mistake my remark about Mr.
Kenyon.

And your head, how is it? And do consider if it would not be wise and
right on that account of your health, to go with Mr. Chorley? You can
neither work nor enjoy while you are subject to attacks of the
kind--and besides, and without reference to your present suffering and
inconvenience, you _ought not_ to let them master you and gather
strength from time and habit; I am sure you ought not. Worse last week
than ever, you see!--and no prospect, perhaps, of bringing out your
"Bells" this autumn, without paying a cost too heavy!--Therefore ...
the _therefore_ is quite plain and obvious!--

_Friday._--Just as it is how anxious Flush and I are, to be delivered
from you; by these sixteen heads of the discourse of one of us,
written before your letter came. Ah, but I am serious--and you will
consider--will you not? what is best to be done? and do it. You could
write to me, you know, from the end of the world; if you coul