uptial
preparations. I am actually in treaty for equipage.

Equipage, Sir!--Trappings, tinsel!--What is equipage; what is life; what
is any thing; to a creature sunk so low as I am in my own opinion!--
Labouring under a father's curse!--Unable to look backward without self-
reproach, or forward without terror!--These reflections strengthened by
every cross accident!--And what but cross accidents befal me!--All my
darling schemes dashed in pieces, all my hopes at an end; deny me not the
liberty to refuge myself in some obscure corner, where neither the
enemies you have made me, nor the few friends you have left me, may ever
hear of the supposed rash-one, till those happy moments are at hand,
which shall expiate for all!

I had not a word to say for myself. Such a war in my mind had I never
known. Gratitude, and admiration of the excellent creature before me,
combating with villanous habit, with resolutions so premeditatedly made,
and with view so much gloried in!--An hundred new contrivances in my
head, and in my heart, that to be honest, as it is called, must all be
given up, by a heart delighting in intrigue and difficulty--Miss Howe's
virulences endeavoured to be recollected--yet recollection refusing to
bring them forward with the requisite efficacy--I had certainly been a
lost man, had not Dorcas come seasonably in with a letter.--On the
superscription written--Be pleased, Sir, to open it now.

I retired to the window--opened it--it was from Dorcas herself.--These
the contents--'Be pleased to detain my lady: a paper of importance to
transcribe. I will cough when I have done.'

I put the paper in my pocket, and turned to my charmer, less
disconcerted, as she, by that time, had also a little recovered herself.
--One favour, dearest creature--Let me but know, whether Miss Howe
approves or disapproves of my proposals? I know her to be my enemy. I
was intending to account to you for the change of behaviour you accused
me of at the beginning of the conversation; but was diverted from it by
your vehemence. Indeed, my beloved creature, you were very vehement. Do
you think it must not be matter of high regret to me, to find my wishes
so often delayed and postponed in favour of your predominant view to a
reconciliation with relations who will not be reconciled to you?--To this
was owing your declining to celebrate our nuptials before we came to
town, though you were so atrociously treated by your sister, and your