aven!

It is impossible to say one half that passed, but he showed me his
determination to act just as he has heretofore, and take it all as a
joke, that no blame might be attached to her. "Besides, I'd rather die
than not see her; I laugh, but you don't know what I suffer!" Poor
fellow! I saw it in his swimming eyes.

At last he got up to go before they returned from church. "Beg her to
meet me as she always has. I told Mrs. Worley that she must treat her
just the same, because I love her so. And--say I go to Clinton
to-morrow to have that record effaced, and deliver up the license. I
would not grieve her; indeed, I love her too well." His voice trembled
as well as his lips. He took my hand, saying, "You are hard on me. I
could make her happy, I know, because I worship her so. I have been
crazy about her for three years; you can't call it a mere fancy. Why
are you against me? But God bless you! Good-bye!" And he was gone.

Why? O Will, because I love my sister too much to see her miserable
merely to make you happy!

Friday, 12th December.

My cripple friend that I mentioned so far back continues to send me the
most affecting messages. "He is really wretched about me; never was
more distressed; thinks of nothing else"; and so on through the whole
list. To cap the climax, he sends me word that he can now walk on
crutches, and the first time he can venture in a buggy, means to call
on me. _Que le ciel m'en preserve!_ What could we talk about? "His'n"
and "her'n" several misfortunes? That's too bad! Every one teases me
unmercifully about my new conquest. I can't help but be amused; and
yet, beware, young girls, of expressing sympathy, even for soldiers!
There is no knowing what effect it may produce.

Sunday, December 14th.

Yesterday evening, some time before sunset, Mr. Enders was announced,
to our great surprise, as we knew he had been in Clinton all the week,
having been transferred there instead of to Jackson, as he threatened.
He was the most miserable, unhappy creature one could possibly imagine;
even too melancholy for me to laugh at him, which expresses the last
degree of wretchedness. To all our questions, he had but one answer,
that he had had the most dreadful attack of "blues" ever since he was
here Sunday; that he had waited every evening at the cars, expecting
us, and at last, seeing that we had no intention