ntly crashed through the closed gates of a
level-crossing in Yorkshire. As the driver did not pull up in order to
see what damage he had done, it is supposed that he was originally a
motorist.

* * *

Another walk from London to Brighton is being organised. It is
hoped that this habit will ultimately bring down the high cost of
travelling.

* * *

The Hammersmith Council, says a news item, has placed an order for
tiles in Belgium. Another shrewd stroke at the Sandringham hat.

* * *

"Trade combinations," declares Sir ROBERT HORNE, "are not responsible
for the increased cost of living." We agree. The struggle for our last
shilling between the dogged-as-does-it butcher and the grocer who
never knows when he is beaten is _a outrance_.

* * *

Next year is Census year, and people are kindly requested to be born
early in order to avoid the rush at the last moment.

* * *

A new bathing-suit invented by an official of the Royal Army Clothing
Department is claimed to make drowning impossible. It is said to fill
a long-felt want among young kittens.

* * *

Should this bathing-suit fail to save any person from drowning he can
call at the office and have his money back.

* * *

We are asked to deny the rumour said to be current in Manchester to
the effect that the PRIME MINISTER was contemplating publishing a
Northern edition of his New World.

* * *

"To be happy, marry a brown-eyed girl," says _The Daily Graphic_. A
correspondent writes to say that he invariably does.

* * *

"My lodger," said a complainant at Clerkenwell Police Court,
"threatens to tear me up into pieces." It was pointed out to him that
this would be a breach of the law.

* * *

During a duel on the cliffs near Boulogne one of the combatants
deliberately fired his revolver into the sea, whereupon the other
immediately fired into the air. There seems to be no end to the
dangers which beset submarine-sailors and airmen.

* * *

A few days ago an angler at Southend-on-Sea fished up a silver chain
purse containing four one-pound notes. His claim that a large leather
wallet containing several fivers and a diamond ring broke the line and
got away after a terrific struggle is being received with the usual
caution.

* * *

The many critics of the POSTMASTER-GENERAL should remember that
telephones are all right if people would only let them alone.