--------------------

which I dedicate to the late Political Convention, as embodying the
principles there adopted, with this difference, that, while their
Resolutions have no point, my resolution enables me to make two points
in every line.

While I'm not in the proverb business, I have a couple on hand that are
getting mouldy, so I send 'em along.

"Once go to grass, and your enemies will soon make a hey-day over you."

"Get all you can, and can all you get."

But that reminds me of a Beautiful Tale:--

Deacon K---- lacked the confidence of the inhabitants of M----. He was
most sincerely detested for his hypocrisy and double-dealing, and so
very unpopular, that a few wags conceived the idea of drawing up a paper
requesting him to leave town.

Once endorsed by two or three respectable names, the joke took; the
paper circulated like wildfire and soon contained every business name in
the place.

A most horrible position to occupy in respect to one's neighbors.

But the Deacon was a genius in his way. Getting possession of the
document, he adroitly changed the heading, and behold! the intended
rebuke was transformed into a humble petition to the President that
Deakon K---- be appointed Postmaster of M----. In due time the
appointment came, much to the consternation and chagrin of the
villagers.

The position was held one season in spite of all opposition; but the
Deacon did not prosper in the end, for after wandering about the streets
of New York a miserable outcast, he naturally drifted on to the
editorial staff of the _Sun_. The End.

Trusting, my dear 'NELLO, you will give me a good setting-up, and cast
my lines in pleasant places, I remain,

Yours in fun,

S. R. DEEN.

* * * * *

TIMELY.

They now put little watches on the outside of portemonnaies and
cigar-cases. There has been doubt expressed as to the value of these
time-pieces; but if they go as certainly as the money and the cigars,
they will do very well.

* * * * *

HEAVY.

There is now a strike among the blacksmiths, and as the men have already
come down very heavily, it is supposed it will be successful.

* * * * *

[Illustration: ADVICE TO YOUNG LADIES.

WHEN YOU HAVE NEW DRESSES OR BONNETS TO SHOW, ALWAYS GO LATE TO CHURCH,
SO THAT THERE MAY BE A FULL CONGREGATION TO PLAY OFF YOUR AIRS AND
GRACES UPON.]

* * *