and although their
method and style be altogether different, yet they may all speak things
very convenient for the people to know and be advised of. But yet,
certainly, what is most undoubtedly useless and empty, or what is judged
absolutely ridiculous, not by this or that curious or squeamish auditor,
but by every man in the Corporation that understands but plain English
and common sense, ought to be avoided. For all people are naturally born
with such a judgement of true and allowable Rhetoric, that is, of what is
decorous and convenient to be spoken, that whatever is grossly otherwise
is usually ungrateful, not only to the wise and skilful part of the
congregation, but shall seem also ridiculous to the very unlearned
tradesmen [_mechanics_] and their young apprentices. Amongst which, may
be chiefly reckoned these following, _harsh Metaphors, childish
Similitudes_, and _ill-applied Tales_.

The first main thing, I say, that makes many sermons so ridicuous, and
the preachers of them so much disparaged and undervalued, is _an
inconsiderate use of frightful Metaphors_: which making such a remarkable
impression upon the ears, and leaving such a jarring twang behind them,
are oftentimes remembered to the discredit of the Minister as long as he
continues in the parish.

I have heard the very children in the streets, and the little boys close
about the fire, refresh themselves strangely but with the repetition of a
few of such far-fetched and odd sounding expressions. TULLY, therefore,
and CAESAR, the two greatest masters of Roman eloquence, were very wary
and sparing of that sort of Rhetoric. We may read many a page in their
works before we meet with any of those bears; and if you do light upon
one or so, it shall not make your hair stand right up! or put you into a
fit of convulsions! but it shall be so soft, significant, and familiar,
as if it were made for the very purpose.

But as for the common sort of people that are addicted to this sort of
expression in their discourses; away presently to both the Indies! rake
heaven and earth! down to the bottom of the sea! then tumble over all
Arts and Sciences! ransack all shops and warehouses! spare neither camp
nor city, but that they will have them! So fond are such deceived ones of
these same gay words, that they count all discourses empty, dull, and
cloudy; unless bespangled with these glitterings. Nay, so injudicious and
impudent together will they sometimes be, that the