play the boor.

First of all I suddenly, and for no reason whatever, plunged loudly and
gratuitously into the general conversation. Above everything I wanted
to pick a quarrel with the Frenchman; and, with that end in view I
turned to the General, and exclaimed in an overbearing sort of
way--indeed, I think that I actually interrupted him--that that summer
it had been almost impossible for a Russian to dine anywhere at tables
d'hote. The General bent upon me a glance of astonishment.

"If one is a man of self-respect," I went on, "one risks abuse by so
doing, and is forced to put up with insults of every kind. Both at
Paris and on the Rhine, and even in Switzerland--there are so many
Poles, with their sympathisers, the French, at these tables d'hote that
one cannot get a word in edgeways if one happens only to be a Russian."

This I said in French. The General eyed me doubtfully, for he did not
know whether to be angry or merely to feel surprised that I should so
far forget myself.

"Of course, one always learns SOMETHING EVERYWHERE," said the Frenchman
in a careless, contemptuous sort of tone.

"In Paris, too, I had a dispute with a Pole," I continued, "and then
with a French officer who supported him. After that a section of the
Frenchmen present took my part. They did so as soon as I told them the
story of how once I threatened to spit into Monsignor's coffee."

"To spit into it?" the General inquired with grave disapproval in his
tone, and a stare, of astonishment, while the Frenchman looked at me
unbelievingly.

"Just so," I replied. "You must know that, on one occasion, when, for
two days, I had felt certain that at any moment I might have to depart
for Rome on business, I repaired to the Embassy of the Holy See in
Paris, to have my passport visaed. There I encountered a sacristan of
about fifty, and a man dry and cold of mien. After listening politely,
but with great reserve, to my account of myself, this sacristan asked
me to wait a little. I was in a great hurry to depart, but of course I
sat down, pulled out a copy of L'Opinion Nationale, and fell to reading
an extraordinary piece of invective against Russia which it happened to
contain. As I was thus engaged I heard some one enter an adjoining room
and ask for Monsignor; after which I saw the sacristan make a low bow
to the visitor, and then another bow as the visitor took his leave. I
ventured to remind the good man of my own business also; whereupon