e for the Germans, for if ever they needed a miracle
it is now.

***

"Information that has come into our possession," says _The Grocer_,
"proves _to our satisfaction_ that Germany has been receiving
plentiful supplies of tea from our shores through neutral countries
since the outbreak of hostilities." The italics are ours: the
satisfaction appears to be our contemporary's.

***

A cynic sends us a tip for the recruiting department of our army. "Why
go for the single man?" he asks. "We may expect just as much courage
from the married man. He has already proved his pluck."

***

"HOW DE WET ESCAPED. A MISSING LINK IN THE CORDON."--_Observer_.

The Germans, who have already been calling the Allied forces "The
Menagerie," should appreciate this item.

***

Angry newspaper men are now calling a certain institution the Suppress
Bureau.

***

A solicitor having announced that he is prepared to make the wills of
the men of a certain regiment free of charge, another enterprising
legal gentleman, not to be outdone, would like it to be known that he
is willing to act as residuary legatee without a fee.

***

In his interesting sketch, in _The Times_, of the PRINCE OF WALES'
career at the University, the PRESIDENT of Magdalen mentions that His
Royal Highness "shot at various country houses round Oxford." We hope
that this will not be quoted against the PRINCE by a spiteful German
Press, should any bullet marks be found one day on the walls of some
castle on the Rhine.

***

It came as quite an unpleasant surprise to many persons to learn from
Mr. ASQUITH that the War is costing us a million pounds a day, that
being more than some of us spend in a year.

* * * * *

[Illustration: THE RULING PASSION.

_Customer_. "BRING ME SOME SOUP, PLEASE."

_Waitress (absent-mindedly)_. "YES, SIR; PURL OR PLAIN, SIR?"]

* * * * *

The End of the Press Bureau.

"Members of several guilds carried their banners in the
procession which went round the church to the accompaniment of
impressive music and the swinging of censors."--_South Western
Star_.

If this had got about, there would have been a bigger crowd at the
ceremony. As it was, Fleet Street was taken by surprise, and only had
time to prepare a few fireworks for the evening.

* * * * *

"Among