Got Down on his Knees and Tried to Say a Prayer 178

Dad Slipped Down a Crevice About 100 Feet 181

Have to Remain There Until Spring Opened 183

Dad and the Anarchists Reveled Till Morning 188

Coughed up over $40 the First Day, Just Giving to Beggars 191

Overboard, One Yell in the English Language, One In Eye-talian 193

Then You Don't Blame Your Little Boy, Do You 197

Wanted to Turn in a Fire Alarm 201

Threw a Pail of Ashes over the Fence 204

Dad Insisted on Carrying an Umbrella 207

The Man Rolled Dad over and he Was a Sight 210

It Was a Picture to See Dad Go up Old Baldhead 214

And She Was Stroking his Hair 217

He Was Yelling for Water 223

Pulled a Long Blue Gun 220

It Brought on a Revolution 227

What Dad Expected of Me in the Way Of Amusement 230

Went over in the Sand and Struck his Pants on a Cactus 233

He Took the Lead for Good Old Rome 235

Had to Kiss Anybody They Brought To Me 238

For Awhile Dad Dassent Go up 241

He Would Break Me up Into Bones, and Throw Me Into a Pile 246

The Russian Told Dad That Nicholas Just Doted On Americans 250

See the Guards Shaking Dice for Our Money 253

A Cossack Rode Right up to Him and Lashed Him over The Back 258

Hit Dad in the Nose With The Butt of a Revolver 255

Hung by One Pant Leg 264

Piled Us out on Top of Dad 269

Dad Stood up in the Sledge 267

Pursued by a Pack of Ravenous Wolves 271

When Dad Put his Hand on Her Shoulder and Petted It 276

Get out You Hounds 282

There'll Be a Hot Time in the Old Town To-night 279

Another Took Me by the Ear 285

He Must Bring his Folks, and All His Wives 289

He Was Just Getting Warmed up 293

Stampede 299

It Takes Nine Baths to Get Down To American Epidermis 304

Sat There Like a Frog on A Pond Lily Leaf 308

Started on a Stampede for the Pyramids 311

I Was Ashamed of Dad 319

Pay, Or They Would Kill Him 316

Dad is Disguised As a Shiek 323

Keep Away from the Banks for Fear The Banks Will Cave In 329

Sang So Loud You Would Think he Would Split Hisself 333

Breathed in his Face 339

The King Got One Piece of the Cayenne Pepper Candy 347

Dad Couldn't Stand It Any Longer 343

Dad's Pants Stayed on the Bull's Horns 349

There is Laughter Everywhere 353

And So This is the Champion Little Devil of America 357

Dad Leaned Against a Lamp Post and Scratched his Back 364

Began to Sell Things To Dad 368

Dad and Leopold Make a Rush for That Swimming P