FREE BOOKS

Author's List




PREV.   NEXT  
|<   168   169   170   171   172   173   174   175   176   177   178   179   180   181   182   183   184   185   186   187   188   189   190   191   192  
193   194   >>  
dered a cab to be called, seized the cage and drove with it to a bird shop in Shaftesbury Avenue. There I sold the parrot for a trifle. I think, Murchison, that I must have been nearly mad then, for, as I came out of the wretched shop, and stood for an instant on the pavement among the cages of rabbits, guinea-pigs, and puppy dogs, I laughed aloud. I felt as if a load was lifted from my shoulders, as if in selling that voice I had sold the cursed thing that torments me. But when I got back to the house it was here. It's here now. I suppose it will always be here." He shuffled his feet on the rug in front of the fire. "What on earth am I to do?" he said. "I'm ashamed of myself, Murchison, but--but I suppose there are things in the world that certain men simply can't endure. Well, I can't endure this, and there's an end of the matter." He ceased. The Father was silent. In presence of this extraordinary distress he did not know what to say. He recognised the uselessness of attempting to comfort Guildea, and he sat with his eyes turned, almost moodily, to the ground. And while he sat there he tried to give himself to the influences within the room, to feel all that was within it. He even, half-unconsciously, tried to force his imagination to play tricks with him. But he remained totally unaware of any third person with them. At length he said, "Guildea, I cannot pretend to doubt the reality of your misery here. You must go away, and at once. When is your Paris lecture?" "Next week. In nine days from now." "Go to Paris to-morrow then, you say you have never had any consciousness that this--this thing pursued you beyond your own front door!" "Never--hitherto." "Go to-morrow morning. Stay away till after your lecture. And then let us see if the affair is at an end. Hope, my dear friend, hope." He had stood up. Now he clasped the Professor's hand. "See all your friends in Paris. Seek distractions. I would ask you also to seek--other help." He said the last words with a gentle, earnest gravity and simplicity that touched Guildea, who returned his handclasp almost warmly. "I'll go," he said. "I'll catch the ten o'clock train, and to-night I'll sleep at an hotel, at the Grosvenor--that's close to the station. It will be more convenient for the train." As Father Murchison went home that night he kept thinking of that sentence: "It will be more convenient for the train." The weakness in Guildea that had
PREV.   NEXT  
|<   168   169   170   171   172   173   174   175   176   177   178   179   180   181   182   183   184   185   186   187   188   189   190   191   192  
193   194   >>  



Top keywords:
Guildea
 

Murchison

 

suppose

 
morrow
 
Father
 
lecture
 

endure

 

convenient

 

person

 

Grosvenor


weakness
 
pursued
 

consciousness

 

misery

 

thinking

 

reality

 

pretend

 

sentence

 

length

 

station


clasped
 

Professor

 

gentle

 
earnest
 

unaware

 
distractions
 
friends
 

friend

 

hitherto

 

morning


returned

 

handclasp

 
warmly
 
simplicity
 

gravity

 
affair
 

touched

 

recognised

 

lifted

 

shoulders


selling

 

laughed

 
guinea
 

cursed

 
shuffled
 
torments
 

rabbits

 

Shaftesbury

 
Avenue
 

called