hat the yellow curtains on the ground
floor were pure silk. As to the upstairs rooms, the shutters were
generally closed. These apartments had not been opened since the death
of Herr von Brincken's wife. He rarely entertained.

Sometimes while I was watching the house, Herr von Brincken would come
riding home accompanied by a groom. He always bowed to me, and
occasionally spoke a few words. One day an idea took possession of me,
with such force that I almost involuntarily exclaimed aloud. My brain
reeled as I said to myself, "Some day I will marry the great man and
live in that house!"

This ambition occupied my thoughts day and night. Other things seemed
unreal. I discovered by accident that Herr von Brincken often visited
the parents of one of my schoolmates. I took great pains to cultivate
her acquaintance, and we became inseparable.

Although I was not yet confirmed, I succeeded in getting an invitation
to a party at which Von Brincken was to be present. At that time I
ignored the meaning of love; I had not even felt that vague, gushing
admiration that girls experience at that age. But when at table this man
turned his eyes upon me with a look of astonishment, I felt
uncomfortable, with the kind of discomfort that follows after eating
something unpleasant. Later in the the evening he came and talked to me,
and I managed to draw him on until he asked whether I should like to see
his garden.

A few days later he called on my father, who was rather bewildered by
this honour, and asked permission to take me to the garden. He treated
me like a grown-up person, and after we had inspected the lawns and
borders, and looked at the ripening bunches in the grape-house, I felt
myself half-way to become mistress of the place. It never occurred to me
that my plans might fall through.

At the same time it began to dawn upon me that the personality of Von
Brincken, or rather the difference of our ages, inspired me with a kind
of disgust. In spite of his style and good appearance, he had something
of the "elderly gentleman" about him. This feeling possessed me when we
looked over the house. In every direction there were lofty mirrors, and
for the first time in my life I saw myself reflected in full-length--and
by my side an old man.

This was the beginning. A year later, after I had been confirmed, I was
sent to a finishing school at Geneva at Von Brincken's expense. I had
not the least doubt that he meant to marry me as soon