me from among the fugitive
half-dreams of the night--a dream confirmed my resolution, although it
flowed like a tributary into the stream of the thoughts that I thought
I had, and brought nothing surprising.

I saw Mara walking amidst the mountains of my home on a snowy night.
Neither moon nor stars shone in the heavens, there was merely the faint
gleam of the snow in contrast to the edge of the dark forest; but
Mara's figure was bright and of distinctive color, as she had appeared
to me under the tropical sun. In red shoes she strode down the
snow-clad river valley, stepped up to the dark houses, and peered in at
the windows; immediately all the windows of the house were illumined as
with the rays of a bright light, and became dark again when the maiden
wandered on. Tirelessly she did the same thing at every house that
faced toward the river, in every hamlet, the length of a long road. At
last she came to my native town and to the house of red sandstone in
which my mother lay in travail. Mara stretched, and grew, and looked in
at the window; the house lighted up within and grew more and more
light, flames flickered within, burst forth at all the windows, and
united together above the high roof. Like a great scarlet flower the
house stood there in the night, the light of the fire flowed over the
snow in the yard and across the ice of the river, and illumined the
snow-covered houses of the city on yonder side. From all the church
steeples the clocks struck the first hour of the day, one after the
other; when the sound of the last stroke died away, the fire in the
house was suddenly extinguished, and once more I caught sight of Mara,
who had eluded my eyes. She came out upon the highway, placed a naked
baby boy on his feet in the snow beside her, and strode back the way
she had come. The boy kept hold of a fold of her garment, and with his
poor little legs trotted along beside her; his heavy head tottered in
every direction, his eyes were tightly closed, and he uttered a
plaintive croaking. Mara too had closed her eyes, a quiet joy animated
her countenance, her feeling seemed to be far off from the poor little
creature which, side by side with her, tramped up into the snowy
forest.

With a shudder I had awaked, and after long pondering I had returned to
my thoughts of the previous evening: yes, this day should be subject to
my will!

And so in the morning I went at the wonted hour not into the park but
into the city.